I know I’m not the only mum who feels ‘Mummy Guilt’ for having their child in daycare but sometimes I just need to let my fears out, so here I go. It seems the accepted ‘norm’ to be a part-time working mum with a child in daycare a few days a week. Everyone around me assures me it is good for me and good for my child but what if one day when my children are grown up they suffer unexpected problems from being left in daycare. Problems that researchers haven’t discovered yet about social, emotional or physical damage. What if my child doesn’t actually enjoy it there (as the staff assure me she does) but she has just learnt to put on a brave face ? What if she isn’t actually learning fantastic social skills but is instead learning how to be a bully, or a victim or a sheep who just gives up and follows the crowd ? What if the endless snotty noses, coughs, gastro, hand foot and mouth and slap cheek are not actually strengthening her immune system but instead overworking it and increasing the possibility of an autoimmune disease as an adult ?

I don’t want to sound like an over anxious mum and I’m certainly not complaining about going to work but sometimes I wonder if we are all just kidding ourselves that we are doing what is ‘best’. Sure I enjoy the ‘me’ time at work, it’s nice having some extra money and it’s fantastic being able to eat my lunch slowly and go to the toilet on my own, but at what cost ? I guess only time will tell and until then I’ll just add this worry to my Pandora’s box guilt and hope it never gets opened.

Posted anonymously, 6th October 2014

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  • Thankyou for your reply, I do feel a little better knowing that even childcarers themselves feel guilty leaving their own children. I have decided I really need to concentrated my effort on better nutrition for my children, we don’t eat a bad diet really but I could be providing more healthy snacks. I’ve decided to get a thermomix. Hopefully that will help to make quick nutritious meals and them hopefully they won’t catch every germ and bug in the centre.


  • Ive worked in early childhood for 13 years now and i still have each child ive ever cared for in my heart!, i live in a small town so many of the children i looked after i still see i love it! Some of them are old enough to work or even legal age makes me feel very old!!! I now do family day care from home and even i get the guilt’s as my children never get just mummy time then my weekends are getting every thing cleaned set up and book work for my kids im always “too busy” today’s lifestyles are so busy and unfortunately cost of living is getting higher and we have to work. Ive always used family day care until this year ive put my own children into long day care and my kids have been good health wise, if you ensure your child is eating correct foods getting enough sleep etc that will help her immune system with colds flu etc, sometimes a family day care environment can be nice for younger children they get more one on one and less germies spread as a smaller number of children etc. dont feel guilty we all have to do it or most of us keep buying lotto tickets thats what i do hehe goodluck xxx


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