With all the media attention to gender selection recently, I was amazed, and horrified, to find out someone I know has done this.

This person was the proverbial “friend of a friend”, about whom I had heard quite a bit.

My friend had raved about this person, how kind, understanding, witty and intelligent she was.

I must admit when I first met her, she seemed to live up to this reputation.

We got along quite well, both having favourite authors in common, so something to talk about!

About a week ago, I mentioned an article I had read about people aborting children based on sex.

Quite casually, she told me she had aborted a boy, as she wanted a girl.

To say I was stunned would be an understatement.

Here was a person, a potential friend, suddenly turned alien. What could I say to her?

I could not even look at her without feeling an incredible growing anger.

Without a word, I stood up and left, shaking and upset.

Only now am I thinking of all the things I would have liked to say to her.

The friend that introduced us has asked me what happened, and is not happy with the way I reacted.

Nowdays we all try to be supportive of other peoples lifestyles and choices, even if they differ from our own, but this, I am sorry, I just cannot condone it. I cannot find it in me to support her in any way, shape or form.

I loathe abortion, but I can understand why some women choose this path. I will, and have, supported friends through this process, but never, ever for such an appallingly selfish reason.

Should I have been supportive? Or is it truly as disgusting a choice as it seems to me?

Posted by katelt, 24th June 2013

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  • the selection


  • top storie great


  • good nice story


  • I think it’s horrible but unfortunately it happens.


  • I do think it is wrong too. Have you spoken to this person ever again?


  • On a personal level, I believe that person had chose the wrong decision. I understand that in today’s era of choice etc, that person can successfully argue that their decision was correct, however I believe the destruction of a life is wrong regardless of what the politically correct beliefs might be.


  • i think this is wrong


  • Wow. you did the right thing by walking away. i would have been so upset if i heard this myself. The whole abortion debate i and all for free choice, i couldnt do it myself but i won’t judge people who do, i have supported my sister through a termination. while it broke my heart that it was my niece or nephew that i will never meet ( i still get teary over it) i know it is her choice and her decision for very personal reasons and i support her 100%. BUT to terminate an innocent life just because it isn’t the ‘right’ sex is absolutely disgusting and selfish :(


  • It is so wrong, and it shouldn’t be allowed!!!!! How could you just kill a baby because you aren’t wanting a boy/ girl. I have two boys, and most likely another on the way although I haven’t had the gender done as I don’t want to. I would ADORE a girl!! But my two boys are so so soooo precious, no way I would abort this baby if I found out that it was a he.


  • this is the first I have heard of people doing this and I think its disgusting. I understand peoples choices for abortion but to make that choice based on gender is appalling. Your friend cant be angry with you for how you acted because u did the right thing by walking away when you were clearly outraged


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