Last week childcare rang to say that my eldest (almost four) had a lump in his throat and asked if I had seen it before. I had not and it appears that this lump which was the size of a marble had popped up over his lunchtime nap. Ten minutes later they rang back to say it was growing and very hard. I left work straight away but due to distance and having to take two trains it takes over an hour for me to get there. Fifteen minutes later, while waiting for my second train my husband rang to say it wa growing before there eyes and they were getting worried. Now I know they would ring an ambulance if his breathing was comprimised but Mother Guilt is just so strong and it kicked in instantly – my boy needed me and I wasn’t there. It is amazing how powerful that feeling is.
Anyway my Mother-In-law went ant got him for me and took him to the doctors where I met them. They believe it is a thyoglossal cyst which children are born with and it grows when they are about four – five (it grew to the size of a golfball). We go to the surgeon this week to find out for sure and probably arrange removal.
As for Mothers Guilt I don’t think that will ever go away – just different levels depending on the situation.
Posted by danieller, 29th July 2013