I’m feeling very sad at the moment. I found out a few weeks ago that my first grand baby is due next year. I can’t describe the excitement I felt at this news! I’ve been madly buying baby clothes, toys, books, knitting away. Looking forward to the big event, planning a trip to visit around bubs due date. Now, I life in a different state from my soon to be first grand baby so I always knew I wouldn’t get to see it as often as I’ld like, I knew that. However, to be told by my son “You can wait til baby is at least 1 month old and visit for 4 days tops!” Well, I lost it, haven’t stopped crying. I know they’ll have a new baby and will be adapting, but I didn’t expect anything more then to be able to spend some time with them, help out with the demands of having a newborn. I know I won’t be a big part of its life, but being told this really made it hit home. It saddens me greatly and I feel like I should just withdraw all together as I’ll only be hurt with limited contact. What do other MoMs think? Anyone else in a similar situation?

Posted by mom81879, 23rd September 2015

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  • i am going to guess that these two have been keeping a huge secret from you….. they have been reading!!! now i see a ton of articles all over the place about having babies and not letting people near them until they have built up an IMMUNITY! Voila! this could be your answer! it is a trend now to keep baby away from public places and to really restrict the amount of people that come into contact with baby. Whooping cough etc is on the rise and many new parents are freaking out. i advise you to get your whooping cough immunisation if you will be around the baby anyway. Don’t take offense! talk to them and tell them what you would like to do and ultimately respect their final decision. Don’t worry, there will be plenty of time to shower the little one in kisses!


  • Wow how very sad. I have no words to help . But adopt a grand child. I would advertise . I rally would ..put in the add what you want..okay .make it clear not a free baby sitter.. But really I live in Campbelltown so does my son and his first child. It is a designer baby . So nothing I would buy would be good enough we are the poorer side .. It’s all good I have three other beautiful grand children.. I have seen his little boy once ..,a rather nice baby ..,but I am now not close to him because I was not allowed to bond .. I do not miss him..
    As I have my other three beautiful grand children. So me I would adopt


  • It is incredibly hard to have a new baby and have relatives staying and “helping”. Maybe they’re just trying to give themselves some space for a few months.


  • dont withdraw from loving your grand child and wanting to support you family, It just sounds to me that they want to set their own routines in their own time before they have any house guests.. Do you have any other family in the area they live that you could also visit to be able to extend your stay a little?.
    Its normal for grandparents to want to help where they can, I am sure they are going to love the hamper of goodies you are going to give them. But mums are so independent and feel the need to do it all and dads are so much more hands on than they have ever been in the past.
    But with things like skype etc you will be able to organize some family time every week, if you ask they could also email you regular photos and updates etc. it would be hard living so far away. But how cool is to be able to have the family come and stay with you as the kid and future kids grow up for holidays. Let them know they will always be welcome when the kid is older and they are happy to travel. .
    This is just a idea but is there a way you could also visit them for a few days a month or two before bubs is due put the offer out there so you can spend some quality time getting to know your daughter inlaw a bit better before bubs comes along??. .
    If you think you have depression and it is here to stay please ask you doctor for some help or a refferal to talk to someone. you will be amazed how much it can help you deal with the situation, emotions a help you cope better. Goodluck….


  • It’s literally breaking my heart :,( I’m feeling so completely unnecessary at the moment. Can’t stop the tears :,( Need coping techniques or something


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