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Last night my 14 year old said the laksa soup I had made for dinner “looked like vomit” and refused to eat it. I was hurt and furious. Normally loves Laksa and it’s a treat. So I told him he could have some fruit, nothing else, and to go to his room with no technology.
Let him later make a peanut butter sandwich and watch a film with us, even though I didn’t get an apology.
His hormones are rife and I remember how difficult and moody that made me at his age. Essentially he is a great kid.
My question is HOW do other parents deal with this sort of thing???


Posted anonymously, 13th May 2014


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  • Laksa is not the prettiest looking dish; but it tastes so good. A good rule is to: “try one mouthful and then you can leave it”.

    Reply

  • I just let it all wash over me, I remember being a teen myself.

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  • sometimes taste’s change and people don’t like things anymore

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  • its one meal in my home, or you go hungry till next meal time. there are no exceptions, and no tolerance for back chat.

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  • Not ma king too big a deal of it, but not letting him get away with really bad behaviour either…. It’s a balancing act. I would have done much what you did, except I’d have expected an apology before he got anything else to eat.

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  • I think you handled it well. My teen recently announced she wouldn’t eat what I had cooked. I said, that’s fine, there’s toast or cereal and she could help herself. No stress, no arguments. I think they are now old enough to make their own if they don’t want to eat dinner and I don’t need to get upset about it.

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  • Its bloody hard, Im a Mum of three, my youngest is 14. I have to say that sticking with your first punishment and not giving in , is the best option. Its hard but you only need to do it a few times and they will realise that you meant what you said. They wont starve, by missing a meal and you did the right thing by offering fruit. counting to ten and a few deep breaths also helps. :)

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  • I don’t think you should take it serious after all even as adults we can be fussy. I have let hubby cook on a few occasions and I have had things to say about his food as well. Just remember you too went through this stage with hormones. He will eventually grow out of it.

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  • I think you need to not take these things personally, just say that’s fine,make your own dinner.. If your rude that’s what you’ll get. He should still have manners

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  • If it keeps up don’t make dinner. I tried this with my three kids as they started working off each other and then all three would say how terrible dinner was. At first they thought we’d get take away but I insisted that since they hated everything I cooked that they cook for themselves. They were much nicer after that.

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  • These comments are great and true but the old story is I come down with the punishment and my husband is the one that gives in… (the good guy). Then I’m left feeling powerless.

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  • he is now coming into then rebellion stay and I found with my lot were the worse. you need to start pulling him into line now as it does not get better it gets worse so when you punishment him you need to stick with it and not letting him to watch movies with you and he did not even sorry.
    Also make him say sorry for what he said or done wrong when ever it happens even when he speaks to you in a tone

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  • Good luck is all I can say at that age they think they rule the world

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  • I wouldn’t of given in to him, if he came to you saying he was hungry i would of said “yeah the soups in the kitchen”
    I would of kept him in his room all night without computers or tv like you had said, as now he knows that you don’t really mean what you say and a hour or so later your back down and give.

    Its very hard to change once you have been giving into them as i full well know but i stuck with it and my kids respect me so much more now.
    Good luck


    • Yes I had to do the tough love no technology thing tonight and I stuck to it with no television or computer etc, despite a few requests. Instead my son read 30 pages of his home reader of his own volition. I had a rather peaceful night without the noise of the televison or any electronics, just us and a funny Roald Dahl book. He had had a spell in his room for being rather defiant and disrespectful before hand. I think I will be doing this a few more times so the message sinks in.

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