An expecting mum says her pregnant cousin’s gender disappointment has caused a huge family rift, following an emotional gender reveal party.
The 29 year-old mum-of-one, who has a three-year-old son, is expecting her second child. While her husband’s cousin, Lena, 27, is expecting her first baby.
“I’m due in late May, while she’s due in August,” the mum explained on an online forum.
“Lena and I aren’t particularly close (and to be honest, I’m not fond of her), but since we’re both pregnant, we’ve been talking more often than usual. It was during those conversations that she expressed wanting a baby girl. She specifically said she couldn’t see herself raising a boy.”
Last month, Lena threw a gender reveal party, and she found out at the same time as all of the guests, that she is expecting a boy.
“She was visibly disappointed after finding out the sex of her baby. She threw on a fake smile during the actual reveal, but didn’t keep it up for long. For the rest of the party, Lena remained frustrated, and was cold and short with everyone who tried to congratulate her.
“I don’t know if Lena told anyone else that she wanted a girl, but her disappointment has gotten pretty obvious. Since her party, she’s been less excited about her pregnancy. We’ve been speaking less, because she doesn’t even want to talk about her baby anymore. Her sadness has earned her some sympathy and support from my in-laws.
“My baby shower will take place this weekend. I’m having a girl, but my husband and I decided to wait until birth to reveal that. As such, none of my in-laws have been informed.”
The mum says Lena called a couple of days ago, asking her about her baby’s gender.
“She said that if I’m expecting a girl, she won’t come to the baby shower. When I asked why, she said she’s still ‘mourning her daughter’, and doesn’t want to be reminded that she’s not having a girl. She also said that since she’d shared her reveal with the family, it was only fair I told her.
“I reminded her we weren’t telling anyone until birth, but told her she was welcome to avoid the shower if she wasn’t comfortable attending. Lena continued to pressure me to tell her, but I stood my ground. After some back and forth, she told me I was being inconsiderate, as I knew how devastated she’d been. She said she deserved to know if I was about to ‘rub my happiness in her face’.
“That’s when I ran out of patience. I told Lena that if having a boy was that awful to her, she shouldn’t have thrown herself a gender reveal in the first place. I said that she could stop celebrating her pregnancy if she wanted to, but she can’t dictate what I do about mine.
“Lena is furious. She told my in-laws that I was kicking her out of my baby shower. I told everyone the truth, but many are still on her side. They’re saying that it’s rude of me to dismiss Lena’s pain, and that I should be more graceful towards her.”
The expecting mum says while her husband and brother-in-law are on her side, she’s wondering if she went too far.
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