Relationships can be hard work, and that’s before you have kids.

Sometimes you’re just too tired to spend time together, or you can’t find a babysitter, and eventually the romance is just gone.

Here are some tips to get it back.

First, you need to Accept.

Life is like a rollercoaster. So many things to do everyday, everything constantly changing and sometimes when it comes to our relationship, it feels that life has taken over with other priorities and that’s fine. Don’t be hard on yourself, it happens to us all. Relationships, like our gardens, need regular watering. You are reading this right now so you are on the right track.

Take action together.

There are two people in a relationship, it is collaborative. You need to take action to find your missing romance together to really find it and feel the fulfilment you are both currently missing.

What is your love language?

I highly recommend finding the book, The 5 Love Languages by Gary Chapman. It describes five basic love languages that help to keep our love tanks full. Discover what yours and your partners are. You need to know how to speak their love language to really fulfil it.

Quality time.

Spend time filling your partners love tank. If you are reading this I am guessing your glass is probably near on empty, it takes some time and energy to fill it. Dedicate time daily to do this and do it from your heart space. Remember giving is receiving.

Self Love is so important to live a happy, awesome life.

You need to love yourself before you can truly love someone else. Remember your relationship with yourself is your top priority. Make your happiness a priority in your daily life and do things that you enjoy and make you feel joy, inspired, freedom and satisfied. Be the person you want to be.

Think about romance and love.

We are what we think about. If you focus on what you don’t have, you manifest more of what you don’t have. Don’t think with lack, think with abundance! Think about romance, love, sex. Thoughts, fantasies or memories. What do you enjoy? Remember what it feels like to be in love and what it’s like when your love tank is overflowing!

Date nights.

Going back to the start of your relationship where everything was fresh and new is what I feel date night is all about. Remember talking for hours and really listening to each other? Getting to know each other over delicious food, wine and a sense of wonderment and freedom. Organise one of these at least weekly for the most benefit.

Spontaneity and mystery.

These two words even sound exciting! As we get older, more often than not, our lives start to feel a little repetitive. Groundhog day! The unknown is a lot more exciting. Being spontaneous and mysterious is good for keeping the energy and love alive.

Play with aphrodisiacs.

Your bedroom should be a playroom of discovery for you and your partner. There are so many cool things to play with when it comes to love making. I recommend all-natural aphrodisiacs. They stimulate the right areas and enhance love, passion, sensitivity, relaxation and fantasy thoughts.

Don’t put too much pressure on yourself.

Enjoy rediscovering each other. It’s a brand new moment and beginning for you both. Starting now.

How do you keep the romance going in your relationship? Share with us in the comments. 

  • So true that giving is receiving. I think more important then romance and sex is: respect, friendship, humor, physical affection, warmth and deep love.


  • Putting family before work would be a big start for us but he still can’t see it


  • It is an easier concept if you are young. My romance is lots of hugs and kisses as my husband nears the end of his life, but I still adore him and will till he dies.


  • I have to start making time for myself. I am a very giving person and I also forget about myself. So I really do need to take better care of myself. I have auto immune issues as well as back problems. So this year I really do need to be kind to my self.


  • I don’t think romance has vpever been a part of our relationship. Love, support, respect….they’re all there


  • We respect each other most importantly we always remember to laugh at each other and ourselves. Date nights are fun and a way to keep the energy in a relationship.

    • Always remember your friendship as that is how a relationship starts and treat your partner in the same way.


  • Every marriage or relationship has it’s ups and downs. Friendship and respect for each other come first I THINK THEN THE REST TAKES CARE OF ITSELF. Romance is still hot and strong at our place after 47 years! lol!!

    • Good on you and your husband to still go strong and hot in romance after 47 years !! I agree with you that friendship and respect come first.


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