This new Mum was devastated to find out that her niece had given her baby the same name as her four week old daughter – but is she being unreasonable?

Posting on the online parent’s forum Mumsnet, one frustrated Mum has told of how she was incredibly hurt to discover that her niece had chosen the same name she had given her daughter for her own baby, just four weeks after giving birth prematurely.

Every Right To Be Upset

The new Mum explained that she feels ‘hurt’ by her niece’s decision, even though she used a shortened version of the name.

“My daughter was born four weeks ago (still in hospital) as she arrived premature. Niece gave birth yesterday morning and named (her daughter) the same name (although I’m putting a longer version on the birth certificate). I’m a bit hurt to be honest – am I being unreasonable?” she wrote on the forum.

While many were quick to jump to the Mum’s defence, “that’s a ridiculous thing to do, I’d be really cross,” some were quick to point out that her niece’s intentions were more than likely not malicious, “if your daughter was prem your niece would probably have used the name before your daughter was born term, and had probably picked it out ages ago.”

Let It Go

One comment on the forum encouraged the Mum to simply ‘let it go.’

“They didn’t know you planned to use the same name; you didn’t know they’d planned to use the name. Are you really going to tell me you’d happily shrug and hit the baby name lists again? Or would you go with the name you had picked out, thought about, practiced saying in your head….? Let it go.”

This is a tricky one. On one hand, we can understand the Mum’s frustration as a name is something you hope your child won’t have to share within their own family.

Unfortunately, particularly in the case of popular names, it becomes increasingly unlikely that they will be unique, and let’s face it, once they go to school they’ll be faced with four Olivia’s, a couple of Jack’s and a handful of Isabella’s…the only way to handle it is to choose to see it as a compliment. After all, imitation is the sincerest form of flattery.

Do you think the new Mum had the right to be upset or is she overreacting? Tell us in the comments. 

  • Look at it as a compliment.


  • It all depends if the mum shared with the niece the name she was going to name her baby if she did then I would be upset too but if nothing was said you can’t really say much.


  • It depends, did the mum tell her niece that she had chosen that particular name? If she did and her niece ‘stole’ for choice of a better word, then I’d be pretty peeved too. Bit if it was just by chance they had picked the same name… then you can’t really do much.


  • I can understand why she is upset, but you can’t control these things and she has the right to name her baby what she wants


  • I know it’s upsetting but is it worth worrying about? You have a beautiful daughter and, since she was born earlier than expected, how can you be so sure your niece hadn’t already picked the name. If so how would you feel if she got upset with you choosing the same name as your daughter. Just try to let it go and enjoy your daughter. Congratulations by the way


  • This is tricky, but I agree, if you didn’t share the name and your baby was born premature, you wouldn’t necessarily have known – or perhaps she would have had her baby first and the issue would be the other way around.


  • No. I don’t think she need to be upset. People have right to choose whatever name for their kids as there are lot of famous name out their.


  • Depends whether the niece knew but I’d be annoyed. I’d probably rename my chikd if it bothered me that much. Better than fuming forever!


  • If the niece didn’t know what the the name was then I would say let it go
    If she did well I would be questioning


  • It would be a bit annoying especially if it was an unique name but there is not a lot you can do, you can’t own a name. Imitation is the greatest form of flattery.


  • It would be a bit of a compliment to have someone choose the same name after you have given it to your baby. My baby’s name is the same as my nephew’s middle name and my other sister’s baby’s name is the same as our niece’s middle name. We all love it.


  • We have lots of similar/same names in our extended family. No one really minds…


  • Annoying but what can you do can’t expect to go through life with no one with your name


  • No, it isn’t a tricky one. No one owns a name or has a monopoly on a name. How childish to make a rant on a forum about something you don’t own and can’t control and afterall, the niece called her child a shortened version of the mum’s baby name *sigh* — it’s just as well the mum isn’t living in the time of our ancestors when the same names were used over and over again in every family line. Yep, overreacting.

    • Oops, should have said niece but a longer version on the birth certificate.


  • I would be upset but then when you are pregnant you pick your name out and don’t tell. They may not have had any other name that they liked. As some one else said there are bigger things in life to worry about.


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