“Have it all” means different things to different people.
To me, it means being able to look at your life and not wish for an alternate one; to have achieved (or be achieving) all of the goals you set for yourself.
My life is not perfect, and it has not been all rainbows and sunshine.
But if I were to do a stocktake of everything I ever wanted vs everything I have, it’s all here, right now: the happy marriage, 2.4 kids, house I always wanted and a business I love.
Of course I still have a million goals I want to achieve (mummy-tummy…you’re next!), but I can honestly say that the life I dreamt of is the life I am living.
I was reflecting on this last night as I cheered my 3 year old daughter on while she attempted to expel a “monster poo” (did I say perfect life?) and I realised that there are five specific things that have been essential along the way:
1) Know what you want.
What does “having it all” mean to you? What does your ideal life look like?
Sometimes life throws us curve-balls and we have to adjust our perception of “ideal”, but from where you are now to where you want to be – what’s missing?
Before you can create the perfect life, you need to know what it looks like for you.
Know it. And then focus on it.
2) Use picture boards.
I know this sounds like a bunch of hogwash, but I swear by it.
Five years ago, I created my first picture board. I put it in a plastic sleeve inside my bedside table drawer and didn’t look at it for three years until I was moving house.
When I did look at it, I found that more than half of what I had put on there had mysteriously found its way into my life.
From a pretty wallet and a nice car, to a wedding day and a baby girl. I was freaked out.
So, I got back on my computer and created a new picture board of everything new that I wanted. Two years later I know what’s on there, and again, already half has eventuated.
Try it for yourself…
Open a word document, copy and paste pictures from the Internet of exactly what you want in life (or do a scrapbooking version if you are the crafty kind!), put it in a drawer and then go and live your life.
In three years you may find yourself freaking out too!
3) Have a great routine.
Every moment of my day is planned, to allow me to achieve the personal and business goals I set for myself.
I wake up and jump straight on the computer and work for two hours. Then I spend my mornings playing with the kids, cleaning or going out. At lunch I spend two to three hours on work, while my little one sleeps and my daughter watches a movie. Then I spend the afternoon with them before a strict bath/story/dinner/bed by 7pm routine. After my husband and I eat, it’s back to work for two hours before spending time with my husband and heading to bed at 10:30pm.
Whatever goal you have, you have to make time for it.
I have a goal to get fit, but I don’t have a 40 minute window in my day that I allocate to getting fit. I count jumping around in the lounge room to “Say Geronimo” with my kids as my daily exercise. If I were serious about the goal, I’d schedule that 40 minutes at the same time everyday, and then come hell or high water I would be doing it.
Make time for your career/business, make time for your kids, make time for your husband, make time for yourself and your health.
We all get the same amount of time to achieve our goals. Use every second wisely.
4) Give it time.
I’ve noticed a pattern in people’s lives.
They talk about something they want, and then three years later they have it. I see it all the time. It’s like the universe has a pre-determined time period to give you what you want; which is just enough time to test you and see whether you really want it!
If you have a goal, work towards it every day. But then, be prepared to give it time to come through for you.
What you do today will change your life tomorrow.
5) Have a “can do” attitude.
People who dwell, or whinge, are boring. My Mum used to say that to me as an eight year old when I lay whinging on the kitchen floor. “Oh how boring,” she’d say as she walked away.
I didn’t like it then, but I understand it now.
People who dwell on the bad stuff, or constantly whinge about the hard stuff, are just boring.
They don’t take responsibility for their own lives, and their ability to improve their lives by changing their attitude (and their routine).
If you want to achieve something, be confident that you can achieve it. And even if you find out that you can’t, find another option just as fulfilling and go after that.
Getting out there, connecting with people and changing lives, is much better than laying on the kitchen floor whinging.
What about you? What would it take for you to have it all? Are you confident in your ability to achieve it?