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It’s Week 4 in my quest to become a less anxious and more relaxed mum, and I’m at a troubling junction with no idea where to turn next.

If you’ve been following this journey of mine from the start, you’ll know that I’ve been learning some Mindfulness techniques that have already enabled me to feel calmer and more focussed.

Mindfulness is teaching my mind how to ignore some of the negative and meaningless chatter in my head and enjoy the present moment instead of always worrying about the future.

But, I just can’t shake this feeling that it’s a little flawed; that it’s actually not the complete solution I was hoping it would be.

What is becoming increasingly clear is that focusing on myself, and adopting self-help remedies in the hope that I’ll find peace, can only be one piece of the puzzle. It can only be one piece of the puzzle for all of us.

Because the place in which we find ourselves, and the people that surround us, and the circumstances in which we’re living in, DO matter and DO affect us.

From what I can tell, no amount of soul searching or self improvement will change the fact that tragedy can strike at any time, that negative people can poison our thoughts or that we’re sometimes living in a world that’s too busy to be beautiful.

So here I am, feeling a little lost.

I’m lost in a world where terrible things happen to good people. A world where planes fall from the sky without explanation.

A world where a mum, with a life similar to mine in so many ways, has had to deal with her future evaporating into dust and is no longer here to love her little family. A world where a dad is losing his battle to spend more time with his beautiful wife and their baby daughter. A world where cancer, car accidents, murderers, starvation, earthquakes and war is killing us.

During these times of disillusion in the past week or so, I came across this beautiful poem. It’s about savouring the times we have before the last time.

It has helped ground me somewhat, and remind me that I need to savour every moment I live, just in case.

It’s just hard sometimes to feel peaceful and calm and blessed (and not guilty) with all that I have, when so many have nothing and so many are facing indescribable challenges.

It’s hard to appreciate the life we live, when the world in which we live in so often disappoints with its cruelty.

I’m still continuing with the Mindfulness meditations, but am now also focusing on healthy eating, no alcohol and earlier bedtimes.

I’m trying to include as many elements of healthy living into my day, as I feel I need all the help I can get to mentally manoeuvre through this roadblock and start seeing the positives in an often negative world.

I obviously still have a lot to learn.

Tell me, do you have an experience you can share or any advice that will help me or other mums that feel the same way I do? 

  • I have days where I am completely overwhelmed by negative thoughts, there’s so much bad stuff happening around us. I let myself wallow in this for a day, maybe 2, and bounce back by focussing on what’s close to me. Usually works

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  • i know what you mean, especially when there are so many other factors that worry us

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  • This is something I really need to try to be more positive

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  • It is a big help to avoid negative people, they suck the life out of you with their dramas, and everything is all about them.

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  • Thanks for sharing this thoughtful article.

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  • I think for me, I TRY to face my demons and banish them as soon as I can. Not always easy.

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  • thanks for sharing. My Canvas Prints

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  • Yes it can be very gloomy, when you think of theses things. I have no good answers, but for me I try and put them in the not think about basket (pretend they don’t happen) and even refuse to watch, read or listen to sad stuff and read a comic or watch a comedy etc. Especially if feeling down.

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  • An inspiring story. Focus on the what is in life, good and bad are just judgments humans put onto experiences. I try to work with whatever comes my way and to learn from the experience without judging it. It is not always easy and has taken me a lifetime of practice.

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  • I make sure that at the end of each day, as I lie in bed, I remind myself of what I’m thankful for from that day and what I will be thankful for the next day.


    • This is a fantastic & positive piece of advice. Worry doesn’t help us, but gratitude does.



      • I encourage my kids to reflect on the day and identify highlights, and things they were grateful to experience. I believe this lessens anxiety and encourages a positive view on life which I hope to foster in my kids as they grow

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  • I’ve been on a similar journey and during that time faced personal tragedy. Its tough and an ongoing process but I found that I had to not get caught in that “world is a horrible thing” mental state

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  • Keep up the good work and good luck with your positive thoughts.
    Try to surround yourself with positive happy people.
    That really helps too.

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  • I wish you well on this continuous journey and thank you for sharing of yourself with us xx

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  • I read your poem and it was lovely but although children grown and change and may stop doing somethings they also start doing other things. There are always first and lasts and this goes on all through life. A first day heading off to infant or primary school can be replaced by a first day heading off to high school, Uni or a first day in the work place. I am finding my beautiful children never cease to amaze me, and the more they grow, the more proud you become of them.
    Also when your child holds your hand, then gets old enough not to have too, remember the time will come again as you age and become feeble and weak hopefully your child will be there to once again hold your hand, help you cross the street or just sit and hold your hand for comfort.
    Also about the world we live in : there will always be the poor and the rich, the weak and the strong, the bad and the good. Just try and be the very best person you can be, be caring and giving to others and see things as half full instead of half empty. Remember for every life that is taken/lost there is a new life born, a babe to blossom and grow.
    Wishing you and your family health and happiness. :-)

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  • I don’t have any. Advice but I know how u feel with 4 kids under 7 I feel like thus most days ..

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