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A mum has been called an ‘evil b*tch’ by another mum, after her daughter’s birthday party exposed a rift between friends.

The drama unfolded after the 36-year-old mum booked a birthday party for her 13-year-old daughter at a trampoline park, which offered a play and sleepover package.

“Her school is very small, so there are only 20 students in her entire year,” the mum explained.

“When we were booking the event, my daughter said to only book 19 places. I asked her if she was sure she wasn’t missing out someone, but she assured me there were only 19 kids in her class, and I was just misremembering.

“Fast forward to her birthday, and this girl Kamilla shows up with an entire box full of gifts: teddy bears, perfume, candles, nail polish, flowers, chocolates, etc. I remembered picking up my daughter from school at the beginning of the school year and seeing her chatting and being very friendly with Kamilla, so I assumed they were quite good friends.”

But the mum soon realised that her daughter no longer wanted to be friends with Kamilla, and hadn’t invited her for a reason.

“When Kamilla went up to hug my daughter and wish her a happy birthday, she lightly pushed her away and told Kamilla she couldn’t attend as we forgot to book her place. I apologised to Kamilla and her mother and offered to talk to the people in charge and pay for her place, but my daughter insisted that Kamilla couldn’t come. Kamilla was very distraught over this and started sobbing.

“I pulled my daughter aside and asked her why Kamilla couldn’t join, even though they used to be friendly and she’d invited every other student in her year. She said that Kamilla was just really weird, obsessive, and creepy, and she didn’t want to be friends with her anymore. I asked her if Kamilla was bullying her, and she said no, she just didn’t want to be around Kamilla. Kamilla’s mother had found out about the party through another parent and Kamilla decided to surprise my daughter knowing she hadn’t been given an invite.

“I returned the gifts to Kamilla, apologised again, and gently told her that there weren’t enough spaces.”

That’s when Kamilla’s mum let loose, furious at how her daughter was being treated.

“Her mother started screaming at me, telling me that I was a grown adult woman bullying a preteen girl. I told her that it was my daughter’s birthday party, she could invite whoever she wanted. She accused me of raising my daughter to be a bully, and that she couldn’t just invite the entire class and exclude one girl. She claimed that Kamilla was my daughter’s ‘best friend’ and she had to right to be invited.

“I told her that my daughter’s a teenager, not a five-year-old, she can’t be forced to invite the entire class just to be nice. I said that I didn’t want to raise a doormat. I didn’t want to teach her to value the feelings of others at the expense of her own – if my daughter feels uncomfortable around someone, then I prioritise HER wellbeing over that of a stranger’s.

“Kamilla’s mother is now talking to the teachers to punish my daughter for ‘bullying’. I’ve tried explaining to her that my daughter was simply setting her boundaries, she shouldn’t have to face consequences for that. Kamilla’s mother said that I was an ‘evil b*tch’ who ‘took joy in bullying little girls’.”

The mum now wants to know if she’s the one in the wrong. Leave your advice in the comments below. 

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  • Wow, would like to hear Kamilas side of the story.
    However, there was no reason for them to show up uninvited. It’s a tough lesson to learn but life moves on.

    Reply

  • This is a difficult one but it was her daughter’s birthday so she could invite who she wanted to. At the same time, it’s unkind to invite all but one person. Her daughter could have just ignored the other girl. I hope all gets sorted out and things calm down. How would her daughter feel if she was the only one not invited to a birthday party.

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  • Weird that the mother and child turned up without an invite, but I also feel like it’s mean to exclude just one person from the class.

    Probably a bit wrong from both mother’s sides here – one I wouldn’t have shown up uninvited and probably would have asked the mother separately if there was a reason my daughter wasn’t invited. Second, I would have double checked the class list and made sure that 1 person wasn’t excluded. Yes, she doesn’t have to invite the whole class, but a bit rough to invite all but one.

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  • Two sides to every story. But why would you trun up if you are not invited. Not proper social equitte indeed. Of course there were issues because of this.

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  • This is so not a good situation for either party. The birthday girl must be having her own reasons for not inviting the girl. However, it was a matter of one day things would have been better if she had chosen to invite her too.

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  • This is certainly not the mum’s fault and a very difficult situation. Kamilla should never have shown up if she hadn’t been invited and maybe sorted out before the party.

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  • urrrgghhh! There’s trouble on all sides there, what one calls boundaries another can interpret as deliberately singling out and isolating one person.
    Maybe at 13 the daughter isnt old enough to know better, but she did deliberately mislead her mum about the number of children there were. And her mum has to own what her daughter did, not just pass it off as ‘im stopping her being a doormat’….. It’s not really anything to do with the school. What happens outside of school should stay there….perhaps the parents need to have a class lesson on empathy and compassion, and the different ways of bullying, for future reference?!

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  • You aren’t the A. Your daughter is.
    Inviting everyone but one child is targeted. She has no real reason, either. You weren’t teaching her to stand up for herself. You were letting her be mean. If it was about her being uncomfortable she would have a reason and not invite everyone else.


    • Agreed! Sounds like daughter may be a bit of a bully.

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  • It’s not right to invite all but one child. Imagine if her kid was the one left out…

    The mum could have done things to prevent this..

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  • Getting to the bottom of what has caused this rift might be the only way to solve the problem. Meantime, I guess you’ll just have to grin and bear it, whatever comes your way or your daughter’s way, come to that.

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  • There’s always 2 side to a story both in the wrong 1st the birthday girl inviting everyone bar 1 no matter how old you are that’s wrong especially going to a small school
    And when the mother pulled the daughter aside and what she said was right the mother should of told the birthday girl to grow up and explain to her why you exclude 1 child from the whole grade
    2/ the other mother turning up with out an invitation and calling the mother a bitch and involving the school

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  • Totally mean to invite all but one and I would never take my kid to a party they weren’t invited to as you know that will end badly!
    Not really sure what is going on behind the scenes as there’s always two sides to one story!

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  • What a mess. And for a 13th! It was definitely not the Mum’s fault and also has nothing to do with the school or teachers. Her daughter is entitled to invite who she wants. Why would the other mum want to embarrass her daughter and out her in a position where it was quite obvious she hadn’t been invited??

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  • A bit rough, but ultimately your daughters decision. Bit cruel to invite everyone in the class but 1 tho

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  • I would normally want a very good and very specific reason to exclude just one child from the party. But why did the other mum turn up with her uninvited daughter? Planning to make a scene or force her daughter where she’s not wanted? That’s not good either.

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  • Yeah, I’m sorry but though the words ‘evil b**ch’ might be a bit strong, it’s the daughter who comes closer to falling under that category. I don’t know the full story here, but it really sounds like a case of a child, and maybe even a whole class, singling out one child. This is not cool.
    It’s also a bit awkward of the mother and daughter inviting themselves when they weren’t invited, but maybe the mother wanted to meet things head on and didn’t think she would be turned away. The mother of the birthday girl should have encouraged her daughter to be kind in this situation. It’s one day and with a whole class of kids there, she wouldn’t even have needed to necessarily spend any time with this child during the party. I imagine with that amount of kids they would split into groups to play or this child would only be a very small part of a large group. The child bought her a really nice gift and it seems like the birthday girl is being a spoiled brat and is actually being taught that it’s okay to be a rude ‘mean girl’.

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  • This is a really horrible situation. Yes by 13 someone should be able to choose their own friends but to exclude ONE person is really unfair. Having said that why would you take your daughter to a party she wasn’t invited to? That’s never going to end well.

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  • I think it’s strange that the girl just showed up uninvited, but also why was she the only one left out. Seems cruel to me. Sounds like this poor girl may be being bullied.

    Reply

  • This is such an awkward situation and maybe a big lesson about kindness for all involved.

    Reply

  • A complex situation !
    I think that all parties involved have really something to learn

    Reply

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