I am sitting in a hospital room, have been for a few days & will keep doing so although I have to return to work tomorrow but will be here every evening afterwards…
We were on holidays in Qld, it was the 17th October the day we arrived. It was late at night, my man went to the toilet & fell. We were at his parent’s place, we placed him in bed not sure at this stage what had happened. The next day he seemed fine although as the days went by he started stuttering, his speech was slurred, his right hand/arm was weak. I was so worried as he has had a TIA (mini stroke) in 2008. I knew he had suffered a stroke of some sort so said he must go the hospital. He is so stubborn & wanted to fly back to Melbourne as he was afraid they would keep him in hospital in Brisbane for weeks & I had to come back to Melbourne.
To say the plane journey was not nice is an understatement, ordinarily I love flying but all I could think of was what if something had have happened whilst in the air, I felt sick literally. We made it however it didn’t end there. I don’t drive, have never had a licence so Jase had to drive- here we go again, I was so worried during the half hour car ride. I know you are thinking OMG what we did was so stupid, it certainly was & I knew this all along.
The next day was Wednesday- he wanted to stay home so I didn’t go to work as I was so worried about him. The following day I made an appointment for him, and by this stage he agreed. His blood pressure was 225 over something, extremely high! He told the doctor he thinks he had a stroke so was admitted to hospital straight away. They ran tests. He had suffered a stroke however he was discharged him the following day. Over the course of the next few days I noticed him becoming weaker, speech was getting worse in fact he couldn’t get out any words at all. He was in the kitchen (so extremely stubborn he is) & stumbled. I popped him on couch (he is double my weight btw) & I thought I can’t do this! I rang his parents & his dad arrived that night. We went to have his eye checked, made an appointment with a speech therapist, did what the doctors asked etc. We went to bed & he said to me he thought perhaps they discharged him too early so we went back to the hospital where they ran more tests. Whilst we were there, Jase had another stroke & started turning an awful colour. I was so scared & frightened, he is my world!
They have since found abnormalities on both sides of the brain & there is talk of maybe operating. I don’t know how long he will be in hospital but I know he is in the best place. I ache for him in bed & the thought of returning to work tomorrow is awful in case something happens & I’m not there but there is comfort in knowing his dad is here as he is awesome.
I posted a story a few months back called ‘My one & only true love’. I can’t lose this man as I’ve only recently found him again. I am so devastated, scared, lonely, frightened, upset, angry, emotional. I don’t know how we will manage on my wage alone but I’m too afraid to think of that at the moment with what’s happening. I know I need to be my bright & bubbly self around him, and be positive but I feel I’m not doing a great job of it. All I can do is be there as much as I can & I will be spending every hour I can with him. It has affected the right side of his face but is worse now. I have to cope with this but gosh it’s a terrible time!