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Here’s a short but deep thought for you to ponder: Are the friends you have in your world truly your friends? Do you ENDURE them or ENJOY them? And if you’re enduring them rather than enjoying them, what value is there in that relationship?

Our time becomes more precious as we mature and you quickly find out what works and doesn’t work for you in your relationships. I can leave social catch-ups with girlfriends and feel totally renewed and energised, whilst for other gatherings it’s like the electricity cord has been yanked and I question ‘Was that just a bad catch up’? or I think ‘maybe I was off my game’.

The real truth is that maybe we could be forcing something that might have slowly dwindled due to life’s circumstances and priorities. Nothing is wrong with you or them, but the enjoyable friendship has turned into one that you endure.

Friendships should be light, fun and above all caring enough to tell the truth in good and bad times. Friends don’t always agree on everything but respect each others differences. One definition of the word friendship says “a friendship is a relationship where one knows, likes and trusts”; another notes that friendship translated through Latin is ‘love’.

So if you have started to endure rather than enjoy, how do we phase out a relationship that we know is no longer serving us? It sounds hard, but there are so many options. Creating distance is a small but subtle start, and you may have enough history to actually sit down and talk about it. It’s possible for you to both acknowledge that you are headed in different directions. It’s also important that you don’t allow the fading friendship to occupy your time or thoughts. Be honest with yourself and make a decision based out of love not frustration.

Spring cleaning relationships is a necessity throughout life, especially for females. This type of spring cleaning keeps us in check of who we keep company with, and how those relationships are influencing us. A real friendship is one that brings out the best in each of you, it challenges you, and above all brings loads of laughter. If you’re not feeling great about any of your relationships, a spring clean could be what’s needed.

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Author: Elka Whalan

Elka Whalan is a much loved and recognized member of the Australian media landscape, both for her athletic career, and her media commentary. A dual Olympian, Elka is now a mother of two young children and can be seen regularly on Sunrise and The Morning Show. Recently Elka also became an Ambassador for Healthy Bones Australia and REXONA, and is passionate about keeping fit, healthy, and keeping the romance alive in her marriage.

  • I think all relationships have moments to endure and moments to enjoy. As long as enjoy outweighs endure, all is good

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  • Really interesting article! Thanks for sharing this!

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  • Thanks for sharing this interesting article.

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  • A lot of valid points here. Thanks

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  • I love my friends and really enjoy their company but know that I am a bit of an introvert & at times find myself mentally spent from spending a full day or even a few hours more than once or twice a week in their company…. I often need time to myself. Friendship does sometimes a bit of work, if that feels like ‘enduring’ then that’s what I’ll do.

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  • I was in a 7 year relationship until he moved overseas without me. Distance created the much needed space for clearing my thoughts, and I realised that I am perfectly fine without him in my life.

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  • I’m lucky, I like my friends!

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  • relationships are to enjoy, if you have to endure then it is time to rethink your situation

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  • if you don’t enjoy then it is time to get out, endurance in a relationship leads to problems

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  • you should enjoy the relationship more time than you endure

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  • sometimes you don’t come to the realisation that a relationship is not providing you with what you need for a long time

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  • enjoy. thank you for sharing this

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  • Sometimes we hold on to a relationship far beyond its used by date for many different reasons, sometimes this is valid and at others its a waste of time and energy, deciding which though is not easy.

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  • thanks for sharing was a good read

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  • Thank you sharing this article to read.

    Reply

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