I sat and had lunch with my sister in law yesterday, and we chatted about life. She has been working the whole time she has been in our lives, nearly 20 years, but has just stopped, as she miraculously got pregnant and now has a 6 week old precious bub :)
In any case, we were discussing work, home etc, and I mentioned how sometimes I feel bad, and embaressed that I don’t work.
BUT YOU DO she said. I have 4 kids (yes all at school) and chose to be a stay at home mum after my 1st was born, although I had my diploma in social welfare. When my last started pre-school, I worked at the same centre he attended on a casual basis for 4 years, then stopped when I was no longer needed.
I later began a facebook business page creating personalised items for people, from blankets to books, keyrings and other items, and love doing this. I am still doing it. But, its just a hobby. I make a very small profit. I also attend market research meetings every now and then, and sometimes, the market research company hire out my dining room and use it for a few hours to conduct their research. I also take care of my hubbys roof tiling business by doing the invoices, quotes, BAS for tax. etc And of course I do the usual mum things like taking kids to sport, picking up from school, cooking, cleaning etc
So, my sister in law said to me, when someone asks do you work, say YES!!
I never looked at it like that and always felt a bit embaressed that I did not actually work outside the home, as such. BUT, now I see, I do still work.
So when you find you feel the same, think about what you do do – its alot, I bet!!

Posted by Sam, 17th August 2016

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  • Even if you didn’t do all those things, raising children is a full time job regardless of whether they are at school or not. In my mum’s era, this was the norm. In this day and age, Mums seem to compare themselves to others and society seems to expect a lot more of Mums. Raising children is THE hardest job there is. Good on you for all that you’re doing and never undervalue yourself!


  • You are most definitely working. Even without the mum/wife/adult duties you are working in the socially defined way of working. If you were to fall sick and was not able to do all the business accounts, your online business etc, someone would need to replace you to get the work done or else the businesses would fail. Don’t sell yourself short. Glad you have a very sensible sister in law that helped you to realise this.

    • Awww, that was so beautiful for you to say. Much appreciated. I hope every mum that feels this way reads your lovely comment :)


  • Ermmmm, Yep – You Work !! and darn hard too by the sounds of it! You may not leave the house to do your ‘work’ between set hours – but I doubt you have very little ‘down time’ either with all your little bits here and there on top of all the regular Mum duties. I chose to be a ‘stay at home mum’ last year when my kids were 4 & 6 as i’d worked right through all their younger years – but honestly, I was so busy then I often wondered how i’d managed to fit work in as well before, lol. I’m back at work now but I’m so glad I at least had my year – Enjoy it, and don’t sell yourself short!

    • Thankyou. You are very sweet to say that – don’t know how you working mums do it all. I salute you!! X


  • I agree with everything you’ve said but still feel like I don’t work. It’s hard seeing everyone involved with their work buddies, doing things, I feel a bit left out

    • Especially when a big bill comes in and it’s like ‘how will we pay this!?’ :/

      • Yeah, I guess its pretty easy to feel guilty. That I think is part of out job description, to often feel guilt. But we need to somehow see the bigger picture, and that is, without us, not much would get done!!


  • I think you’re doing more than enough with the “domestic” stuff, let alone helping out in hubby’s business and doing your own “hobby”. Amazing.

    • Thanks – taken a long time to realise it, even with so many people telling me. Life!!! YOu just never know where you will end up…


  • Thank you!
    I will have to find some smoothies without banana though, because I can’t stand it! :D


  • Thanks for sharing your story. I am busy too and love it! :)

    • best way to be with our true loves ..our children, our world


  • Of course you work. You are doing one of the most important jobs in the all world! :-)

    • yeah, I guess. Thankyou. Sometimes mums just tend to find a reason to feel guilty I guess or find a reason to believe we are not doing enough. Nice to hear though that we do, in fact, do it all :)

      • Well, I guess that if there were less moms deciding to stay at home, the society would be so much different. And I’m not sure it would be for the best. :-) So continue doing what you are doing, and be proud of yourself! :-)

      • Cheers, thankyou. Yes, I guess if everyone was in the same boat, the world would be a very boring place :)


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