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Where have all the undies gone?

Actually should clarify here, this is and has been an on going case for quite some time.

My 6 yr old Saxon and joint troublemaker 4 yr old Zahra, have an aversion to undies.

I have to check many times a day, to see if they are still where they should be – under their clothes. And not where we typically find them, behind the toilet, in the bathroom, on bedroom floors, in the toy box.

Basically anywhere they think I’ll never, ever think to look.

I am to say the least, baffled; we have tried different styles, shape, fit. You name it, but those undies sneak off the kids little butts, and go hide.

Now I could understand if they were having the little kid ‘accidents’, a drop of pee or dare I say the occasional skid mark.

But no. All systems are go, so what is it? Do little boys have a genetic predisposition to an overwhelming urge to go commando? And if you’re to follow that same line of thinking do little girls as well?

Do they know something we don’t know? Just like kids are supposed to be half in the spirit world – do they intuitively know something about testicular and vaginal health?

What’s wrong with free balling it I hear you say?

Well nothing at all, unless you sit down in front of your mummy and you’re little wang jumps out to say hello. And don’t get me started on what a shock it is to catch little Zahra’s hoo ha grinning at me.

Not to mention that visitors in our home could be exposed to the same ‘conditions’, and I really don’t like the idea of other people seeing my kids bits. Let alone be confronted by the pile of undies in the loo.

Something most unsettling about seeing someone’s jocks on the toilet floor.

Doesn’t matter if they’re kiddies undies, makes one think of all manner of nasty accidents that have caused the wearer to ditch their jocks, and wonder if it’s hanging around, will I leave the toilet with the bubonic plague?

It has me stumped and oh so frustrated. The running out of undies, the finding of the secret stashes, the washing of the fifty pairs you’ve just found – that takes ages to peg each tiny little pair on the line.

The bare asses, the missing undies.

Why must the undies always be missing?

  • Have you checked behind drawers in wardrobes, under the lowest drawer, the back of a shelf in your linen cupboard, the cupboard below the trough in the laundry, behind the washing machine??? Do the bed frames have slats? Maybe they have been poked up through the slats and are underneath the mattress. Not thrown in the back of the wardrobe instead of going in the wash. If the beds have trundles maybe check them too, and under them if it has castors as that means there is a small gap under there. Talking from personal experience with some of these and heard the others. (you might find food / wrappers off them in some of those places too).

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  • Never had that problem with my boys. It was more of where have all of their clothes gone. The problem was solved when I found everything under their beds. Now I know why their rooms always looked so tidy.

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  • Never had this happen to me – you must update us later as to whether it has helped your children or not.

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  • Would be great to have an update of how things are going long term

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  • We don’t have a missing undies problem. Missing socks are more our issue. There’s always one that disappears from a pair :/

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  • One of mine would be a happy chappy if he could skip the undies and he is a lot older :)

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  • Sounds like they need some good discipline explain why they need to wear them i.e protecting their private parts and keeping their private parts private. Explain there will be consequences if they keep removing them at inappropriate times and most importantly follow through on the punishment not just warnings

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  • Haha what a great article for a laugh. My daughter gave me a flash the other night when we were playing monopoly. She had taken her undies off but hadn’t put on her night pull up yet.

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  • So cute lol!

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  • Funny story! Thankyou for the laugh looks like we aren’t the only ones with the case of the missing undies

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  • Funny story. We fortunately don’t often lose our undies.

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  • Thanks for the well written and very funny story, it did bring a huge smile to my dial and a giggle that made me wiggle.
    So glad to hear things are better now and the undies are living up to their name.
    All the best of wishes to you and your zany bunch. :-)

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  • Thanks so much for the giggles, so well written, it does paint a vivid picture of your household and i’m glad they stay on your kids now that they are older.

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  • Oh my! How very funny!

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  • Love the humour it painted a very vivid picture. I would suggest that you try what worked for my girlfriend when hers did the same. She took them with her and asked them to choose their own and suggested to them that if they left them lying around another child might possibly think you don’t want them and take them home. It worked for her, She even made a special Basket in their rooms that had two sections, one for clean and the other lined with waterproof lining for dirty.

    Reply

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