I had my babies in my thirties but I have friends who had a bub in their twenties and even in their teens and others who waited until they were past forty. I’ve heard of mums being told they’re too old to have a child, but this woman was told that she is too young to have a baby.
I can understand if she’s a teenager and still at school. Perhaps that is too young to have a baby. Although saying that, there are many teens who tackle motherhood better than older mums. And what about in the ‘older days’? If our great-grandparents weren’t up the duff by the time they were 20-something, there was definitely something weird going on.
But this woman is in her early-twenties and apparently, that’s now regarded as being too young to have a baby. Really???
The frustrated woman explained her situation to mumsnet readers saying:
“So my partner and I have been together for 8 years. I’m 23 (almost 24) and my partner is 26. We are engaged, own our own home without a mortgage (we are extremely lucky) and are always on time with our bills. We both work full time.
“Anyway. I ask this, because I’ve been told by a close family friend that we are way too young and irresponsible to be trying to have a baby, when we are just ‘babies’ ourselves.
“This comment has really upset me. I don’t feel as though we are too young or immature at all. We pay our own way for everything we have, we work hard and save hard and this is something we have waited for, until it felt like the right time. Our wedding was called off due to COVID-19 and this is something we both want..
“Maybe I’m being unreasonable, but I don’t feel like this is the wrong decision for us.”
You ARE Too Young To Have A Baby!
The responses from the Mumsnet readers were quite mixed and I was surprised at how many people actually agreed with the ‘close family friend’.
“What’s the rush? 23 is young to be TTC. Assuming all is well, you have many fertile years ahead of you,” said one.
“You are still quite young. I’d recommend waiting until you’re married for the security that will give you,” said another.
Enjoy The Freedom
Others advised the women to enjoy a debt-free life before kids come along.
“You are mortgage free at that age? Oh my god enjoy it before you have your children. Spend a few years having the money to enjoy your lives before you have your children,” advised one reader.
Just Do IT!
A few told the woman to ignore what others say and just do what’s right for her and her partner:
“Ignore them, there’s not a ‘right’ age bracket simply a trend that people tend to be a little older than yourselves these days. We are in a similar position and are just going with it, trying to block out all the opinions!”
“Don’t let anybody tell you what to do, if you feel ready to have a family then go for it.”
“Ridiculous. If you are ready and financially secure why on earth not.”
“I’d go for it. Two of the best parents I know had their DCs in their early/mid 20s. When they have “flown the nest”, my friends will still be young enough to travel etc with a hopefully long life ahead of them.”
What age did you have your first child? Do you think this woman is too young to have a baby? Tell us in the comments below.