If your child refuses to poo all day while at school, new research reveals you’re not alone.

Almost half of Aussie kids aged 3–8 (44%) have held in a poo at school, while 30% say they’re scared to use a public toilet. For many children, it’s much deeper than just wanting to feel comfortable while doing number twos. They’re dealing with real feelings of stress (25%), hesitation (24%) and overwhelm (22%) when it comes to using school bathrooms.

The research of Aussie parents also found that 71% of parents say they’ve faced resistance when their child needs to go.

School poo refusal is more common (and more stressful) than we think

What might seem like a simple daily routine can feel like a big deal for little (and sometimes bigger) kids.

Parenting expert Genevieve Muir explains that when children are at school or childcare, they’re already juggling a lot: new routines, friendships, rules and time away from home.

“When there’s so much going on, doing a poo can feel hard,” she says. “Kids need to feel safe and relaxed before their bodies will let them go.”

That helps explain why so many children hold on, even when they really need to go.

To tackle the touchy issue, toilet paper brand Kleenex has teamed up with journalist and mum of two, Jessica Rowe, and a team of experts, to create ‘I Can’t Wait! My First School Poo’ book, a new resource that will be available for free at 120 early education centres, libraries and allied health professionals across the country and available to access at Kleenex.

“Starting school can be an overwhelming time for parents and their kids,” Jessica says. “There’s a lot to get your head around, including using the toilet at school! Like a lot of kids, I don’t think I did a poo at school for most of the time I was there! Now, I think laughter can help with honest conversations to help our kids realise we all do it, and that it’s just a part of our everyday lives.”

School poo refusal worrying parents and teachers too

Holding it in all day isn’t just uncomfortable, it can lead to bigger issues.

Around 42% of parents are concerned about potential health impacts, while others worry their child might be teased (26%) or embarrassed if something goes wrong.

A large number of teachers report kids holding on or panicking about school toilets, and nearly half have seen children being teased about it.

Even teachers admit it’s a tough topic to raise, with a third unsure how to approach it with parents.

So what actually helps?

Open, relaxed conversations can make a huge difference. When kids understand that going to the toilet is completely normal (and nothing to feel weird about), it takes away a lot of the pressure.

It’s worth remembering it’s really common, and nothing for kids to feel embarrassed about.