A dad claims he was ‘forced’ into parenthood after a woman he was seeing casually told him she was pregnant…

A man has taken to popular parenting forum Mumsnet to ask if he is being unreasonable to feel ‘forced’ into parenthood.

The man says he had been seeing a woman casually for three to four months and believed she was using contraception but was shocked when she announced she was pregnant and expected to resume their relationship.

A Big Shock

The man says he is already the father of a three-year-old girl, who he fought to have 50/50 custody of, but is being constantly chased for child support and told to take responsibility for this new baby.

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“I felt betrayed, used and tricked into something I never wanted and to that point I was clear about,” he wrote.

“I made it clear that I wanted nothing to do with it now or in the future and she decided to go ahead.”

The reluctant father says he feels pressure to be involved in his child’s life.

“Why should I be responsible for something which I was effectively tricked into and something I then had no control over?” he asked the forum.

It Takes Two

Comments on the dad’s post were critical of his willingness to blame his former partner for the pregnancy.

“It is not the child’s fault that its parents were a bit slapdash with contraception and you need to take some responsibility for that,” one forum user wrote.

“Nobody has forced you into anything that you weren’t aware could happen.”

“Accidents happen,” said another.

“Why should we have to bear the full cost and responsibility, just by virtue of our biology?”

This dad didn’t exactly get the support he was looking for! We can only hope that this baby is able to be brought up in a loving environment without this sort of tension.

Do you think this Dad should take responsibility or does he have a point? Share your thoughts in the comments.

  • My partner and I had only been seeing each other for 3 months when I fell pregnant. He has 3 older kids from his marriage.

    I told him from the outset I had just stopped taking the pill because I had started a new medication that required me to stop taking it. So he knew full well it could have happened and it did, he never once carried on like this “man” and he never wanted anymore kids.. now here we are with 2!


  • It’s a shame if he feels tricked, but he most certainly cold have taken precautions – and now he needs to take responsibility.


  • So you start seeing someone new. She tells you she has other forms of contraception, so you go bareback?? You weren’t even considerate of STI’s so you deal with the consequences of your actions. As a single parent who has 50% custody, you would think that you’d be more thoughtful before diving right in.


  • SHe didn’t have an immaculate conception


  • Regardless of the blame game , it’s too late for that now. He needs to take responsibility for the child he has helped to create. The child should never blamed for their parents inability to to be responsible. If he didn’t want children then he should of taken the necessary precautions to ensure that!


  • This is a tricky situation. Contraception should be the responsibility of both adults. I hope this child is raised to feel loved.


  • I think he should know what he was done and take the responsibility.


  • Havent you posted this story already? Or is this a bump up of an old post. Struggling for content?


  • No 1. If you were seeing her casually why the hell wouldn’t you use protection
    No 2. Ask her to get a paternity test done which you should pay for and
    No 3.No one forced you to have sex so with her so be a man and step up to your responsibilities.


  • Don’t want to be a Dad? Then don’t have sex! It’s that simple. Even with contraception there’s always a risk. Stop portraying yourself as the victim when you could have easily averted the issue by wearing a condom rather than presuming your sexual partner was going to take all of the responsibility f
    or both of you. Even with a condom there is still a risk. It’s simple biology. Vagina plus penis equals baby! The only victim here is the poor child who didn’t ask to be born or to be viewed as a burden by a selfish man! or have her mum painted as a wicked man – eating villain, for that matter. Grow up, man-child!


  • Some men need to take more responsibility for contraception. Why should it be the woman’s responsibility


  • It takes two to tango – if you don’t want to be the father of a child take all the precautions yourself.


  • If you don’t see her taking a pill or have a contraception implanted then wear a condom!


  • Keep it in your pants then!


  • I do feel bad for him in a way, especially as accidents do happen – but given the situation, he should/needs to turn this into a positive, that he now has another offspring, and instead of paying child support, look to actually being a parent. As adults, the hard fact is that we have to take responsibility for our actions, even for the mistakes that we make.


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