Is it better to be an older Mum?

Does age matter, when it comes to being a mum? For those who fall pregnant later in life, there maybe some benefits but it’s not what matters most.

Being a mum AT ANY AGE is wonderful and an incredible gift, and whatever age we have our children, we’re all smugly sitting reading this thinking we got it just right. Right?

But with the recent news of Michelle Bridges first pregnancy at 44 years, this has got many of us sitting up and paying a little attention. And even though she’s created a media storm by suggesting her pregnancy was due to her healthy lifestyle (cough), the fact is it’s tough to fall pregnant at 44, especially with your first baby.

I’m gleefully waiting for her to ‘blow out’ like I did where all my other body bits got the “we’re pregnant!” memo and decided to join in the party. However I’m guessing that even as an older Mum, Michelle will have one of those teeny, tiny baby bumps and will wear her pre-pregnancy jeans to go home from the hospital. If any of you are nodding your head thinking “that sounds like me’, then I’m sorry but we can’t be friends.

But Michelle will soon experience many of the positives of being an older mum. And yes, for you young mums, I know for every positive, you have a version of your own – being a mum is awesome at any age, right?

For starters, even though I’m a little fascinated with the Michelle Bridges/Commando love fest, sometimes it takes a while to find the father of your babies, and as an older Mum, you’ve been around long enough to know when he’s arrived. And often there are a few false starts along the way.

I know this for a fact, and thankfully, second time around, with a few more years of wisdom and life on the clock, when father of my soon-to-be sons arrived in my world, I knew he was the one I was waiting for.

I’m grateful for waiting. And my three beautiful boys are too.

As an older mum you’ve had the chance to (ahem) live a little. You’ve backpacked around Europe, sleeping on friend’s dodgy lounges, drinking too much Guinness in bars in Dublin, (and then attempting to climb on top of tables to sing along with the music with the new ‘best friends’ you’ve just made). You’ve spent too much of your salary on a handbag in Milan, and shivered watching the sunset from the top of Mount Sinai (having a wee behind a rock because that’s just how you were rolling). You haven’t had to do a school run in your PJ’s at this stage of your life.

Career wise – that old chestnut we use as woman who’ve had babies later in life is that we’ve had a chance to establish ourselves, to try different career paths, shaking our heads, pull up and socks and try another. We’ve experimented, we’ve taken risks, and we’ve worked our butts off, pulling ‘all-nighters’ to finish a presentation, without thought or care of time or responsibilities.

By the time I was ready to be a mum, I had done what I needed to, to get where I wanted to be in my career. This definitely helped smooth the way back to work for me so I could work flexi hours, disappear for a school Easter hat parade, or race home to rescue the nanny sitting on my roof trying to get in the house having locked herself (and my two boys) out (true story).

My point is as an older mum, you’ve worked out what you want your career to look like, and you have got to a point where you can think, “ok, I can step away now.” You can now be defined by new priorities and are richer for the perspective of what both ‘sides’ look like – and the one you want to choose.

You’re not the same person you were in your 20’s, and love her or hate her, this you is definitely wiser for your life experiences.

Being a Mum is awesome regardless of whatever age you choose or are able to do it. If we have little people to tuck into bed each night, and to grip clammy little (or big) hands, or inhale deeply the smell of their hair, then we’re all winners.

And for Michelle Bridges, about to enter this wonderful world we live in, congratulations. Nothing else has or will come close in your life, we’re glad you’re finally able to experience it like we are.

What are you thankful for as an older Mum? And hit us with the reasons why being a young mum rocks too?

Main image courtesy of Getty.com

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30 Comments

- - mom66977 said
  - 17 Sep 2015
    9:25 pm
better to be a young mum

- - Gorgeybee said
  - 16 Sep 2015
    8:39 pm
I’m just thankful I found a wonderful husband early enough for us to have three, healthy, beautiful children. There’s no more precious a gift, and no more great a responsibility in this world. But I do have to say that each pregnancy takes its toll on the body, and I definitely knew #3 was our final when all was said & done

- - dannsbuild said
  - 15 Sep 2015
    3:29 pm
Interesting! That’s a good article! Thanks for sharing this!

- - mom81879 said
  - 03 Sep 2015
    8:38 pm
There’s pros and cons I think. I was 23 for my first and I think that was a good age. I’m here to see them grow up and hopefully won’t be too old for when the grandkids come along

- - jodiev1980 said
  - 27 Aug 2015
    6:38 pm
I don’t think it matters. No one is probably ever truly ready for the change kids bring into your life.

- - kozack said
  - 01 Aug 2015
    9:30 pm
whether your young or old as long as you feel you re ready and can love and provide for your kids then that’s what matters

- - hopefullyheidi said
  - 31 Jul 2015
    10:45 pm
Whatever age you are there will always be opinionated nay Sayers

- - mom151414 said
  - 25 Jul 2015
    5:34 pm
It’s not about being an older or a younger mum. It’s about being a good mum, the best you can be. Whether you are 17 or 47 there will still be good and bad days. There are challenges that seem insurmountable. But the most important thing is not having a baby because you want a a cute little fashion accessory, because they don’t stay like that for long, but because you want a family and all that goes with that.

- - mom94125 said
  - 24 Jul 2015
    7:27 pm
i think that if you are ready for a baby, it doesn’t matter about age

- - jools41 said
  - 24 Jul 2015
    3:13 pm
Nice article – I was 38 when I became a mum for the first & unfortunately only time after 8 years of trying and IVf & even though sometimes I wish I had a bit more energy to keep up with my now 5 year old I am just supremely grateful she is here.

- - mom151106 said
  - 23 Jul 2015
    11:41 am
I\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\’m 47 & pregnant. I have a 22,9 & 7 year old kids. Wasn\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\’t trying to have a baby but was fit and reckon that is why it was so easy. I had my 3 in Australia and this is my first U.S. born! Oh yeah I also lost a baby and a tube in 07. What are the odds!

- - BellaB said
  - 22 Jul 2015
    4:49 pm
I’m grateful to be a mum, but I do wish I’d met my partner a little earlier in life so I could have been a younger mum.

- - mom71809 said
  - 22 Jul 2015
    2:33 pm
She’s pregnant! How did I mkss this news? Is commoando the daddy? I heard they went back to their respective partners. She’s older but her fitness will give her the zest of a 20yr old mum. Congrats to them !

- - cherz said
  - 22 Jul 2015
    12:59 pm
Personally I see the age of having children reflects and lies with the parent it is a personal thing and every one is different and every ones health is different.
I myself do not agree with having children to late in life, sometimes when you calculate the age of a parent, say when the child is 15, you wonder if the actual parent will still be living.
Congrats to Michelle and Steve and wishing them much happiness and good health.

- - mom74640 said
  - 22 Jul 2015
    10:01 am
Lke it

- - mum4107 said
  - 22 Jul 2015
    6:02 am
As an older mum, I’m just greatful I got to be a mum
- mom93821 replied
  
  23 Jul 2015 , 6:45 am
  Exactly, a blessing at any age!
- - mom93821 said
  - 22 Jul 2015
    5:14 am
Being a mum ‘rocks’ at any age and is truly a wonderful blessing. Everyone is different, regardless of age as personality is key in determining attitude and patience and parenting style. Being the best parent you can be is more important than age.

- - mrsdew17 said
  - 22 Jul 2015
    12:43 am
Hard to know how to answer…hindsight is easy. Know of people who have parents that were in the much older age bracket and their childhood was tough when everyone teased them about how old their parents were so guess that is something to consider.
- sunflower replied
  
  02 Jan 2021 , 9:37 pm
  Not really an issue these days as lots of people are having kids later and people are aging better.
- - mom141765 said
  - 21 Jul 2015
    8:38 pm
My mum was 40 when i was born. My dad was 47. Because of that i vowed to have kids before i was 30. To be brutality honest it was embarrassing when people would constantly think they were my grandparents. But more than just superficial stuff like that (i love my parents) we just never did the things that my friends with younger parents did, my parents just didn’t seem to have the energy. All the fun stuff i remember from my childhood happened with friends and their families. I also never met my grandparents and didn’t want that for my kids. Nature makes it hard to conceive as you get older for a reason.
- mom71809 replied
  
  22 Jul 2015 , 2:37 pm
  Thanks for sharing this, I had a similar experience 2ith older parents leolle thought were my grandparents and them not having the energy to do anything with me
  - sunflower replied
    
    02 Jan 2021 , 9:39 pm
    
    Michelle is a good example of how that is not true for every parent. I know plenty of parents in their 40s with energy.
- - crystalangela said
  - 21 Jul 2015
    8:34 pm
I was 30 with my first so, a lot older than most people I knew having there first but by no means as old as some people are leaving it now.
I enjoyed the stability being older meant I had a good financial place but I did miss the energy a younger mother might have,