Constance Hall explains why we need to stop the motherhood pressure, before it’s too late!
Constance explains on Facebook after having her first child she recalls asking her dad how on earth her nanna did it with 11?
Her dad responded that her nanna wasn’t given half the pressures mum’s are today.
Con admits that her nan “didn’t have to go to the bank, the supermarket everyday, she wasn’t expected to look a million bucks straight after birth and she never put pressure on her kids to have reached all of their miles stones by the age of 3 weeks, have the house clean and own a thermomix. She just hung out with her kids and enjoyed them.”
Con asks, “So how do we do it, with all of the pressure we are put under?”
She continues, “Well a lot of us don’t actually enjoy our kids, we are only half present for them all of the time due to the constant pressure to have everything perfect. Meanwhile we are losing the time to be present the with our children, half listening to them, preoccupied, nodding along while our brains are thinking “f#$k now Video Easy is taking legal action on that $12 fine.”
Constance shares what shocked her into reality was something that happened at a seminar she attended yesterday hosted by Rafiki Mwema, lead by therapist Anne Marie. The guests of the seminar were encouraged to participate in an experiment.
They were told to partner up with someone and tell a story, half way through the story the partners were ordered to stop listening. They looked away, yawned, preoccupied their minds, replied to an email, all while the story teller continued.
“And guess how it made me feel?”, shares Constance. “Boring, embarrassed for not being able to interest anyone, unworthy and insignificant.”
“Is that what this busy life is making my kids feel?”
Con concludes, “Today I woke up with a desire to take a deep breath and let it all go, I don’t really care about the new blinds I had ordered or making the house decent so that my mates don’t think I’ve lost the plot.
But I really care about my time with my kids and how they feel about themselves.
And I’m not going to let outside pressures and “Super mum” ideals take that away from me.”
Adding in the comments, “The reason I wrote this is because it made me feel guilty, we all do it. Don’t be hard on yourself- blame society for expecting too much from us!!!”
Do you feel constant pressure as a parent?
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