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January can be a tiring time, the excitement of Santa pressies has worn off, the kids are exhausted from their late nights and you’re back to work, but they aren’t back at school.

I am going to make this whole New Year Resolution stuff easier for you.

There is only one resolution you need for 2019 (and every other year!).

To love yourself more

Mums give so much of their time and energy to their kids, family and friends and often leave just the scraps of energy left for themselves. When I changed from being like this, to prioritising myself more and connecting with myself I actually found I had MORE quality time to enjoy with my kids!

Yep! Spending more time with just you and being nice to yourself helps your kids be happier. It’s a great ripple effect.

When you practice pressing pause on the chaos and being kind to yourself, you will see your energy and happiness transform.

Here are some quick tips on how to explore loving yourself more:

  1. Nicer Self-Talk:

    We all know too well how negative that inner critic can be. The expectations we set for ourselves are unrealistic, you’d never ask your best friend to expect that of herself. Notice how you talk to yourself and shift it to something nicer!

  2. Practice Gratitude:

    It’s so easy to get caught up with what’s wrong in our life. One of the fundamental laws of the Universe promises that you get more of what you’re grateful for. Write 3 things a day you’re happy to have in your life. Be specific and varied in your list.

  3. Quit Taking Score:

    Life is supposed to be fun! When you stop taking score over what you did better/worse than other Mum’s, or who did more stuff at home with the kids you’ll be happier. No-one is perfect and everyone is often trying their best. This game playing rarely makes anyone happier..

  4. Accept & Ask for Help:

    Right now you may not have time for yourself as you have too much on your plate. Start to notice how often you actually (politely) refuse offers of help from friends, family or partners. People like to help. Start by either accepting the next offer of help, or asking for it and finally

  5. Ditch the Guilt:

    When you get time to yourself know that you deserve it. Us Mum’s are often ‘killjoys’ of our own happiness.  Give yourself permission to enjoy this precious time.

Embrace these tips and I promise you’ll be happier. It’s not selfish to love yourself. You can’t give what you haven’t got, fill your cup up!

How do you practise self love? Share with us in the comments.

  • My only resolution (and I might sound selfish or needy) is to keep surviving. My boys are grown up and I know they are strong enough but I’m not anymore.

    Reply

  • Makes perfect sense… (but for some reason I can’t view the other comments on page 2 of the comments).. how do I practise self-love? It often revolves around being alone! Time to de-stress; and eventually do whatever I fancy without having to compromise for other people. Sometimes that means doing nothing; othertimes it means being really active, doing lots of things I want (including sometimes things around the house that make it nicer for ME!), buying myself a little gift, or just doing that thing I wanted outside the house that I wouldn’t get to do otherwise.

    Reply

  • So true ! We have to fill our bucket before we can love and care for our family and deal with everyday life.

    Reply

  • Everyone needs to do this

    Reply

  • I know I always put myself down but we do need to look at what we have achieved and feel better for it.

    Reply

  • So hard at times to ask for help – the easier option is to pick out a tree to drive into as fast as possible so you die. But take a step back and like me you might end up with the most wonderful life you could imagine. Hope everyone thinks twice.

    Reply

  • Ditch the guilt – easier said than done.


    • Agree – but if you can you will feel so much better.

    Reply

  • Old habits are hard to break especially when it comes to criticizing myself about my Mum habits. These are some good tips which I am definitely going to try and put into practice.

    Reply

  • Great tips ! Living in a country with none of our families here enabled me to learn to reach out and give help to those around me and ask help from neighbours & friends when I needed in return. Nice self talk and self care is something we need to practice daily and see as an absolute priority !
    Taking score is something I ditched long ago, that’s behaviour children show. And guilt is just a useless negative force, robbing you from positive energy. No time for that !


    • Nice to practice gratitude – by writing 3 things a day you’re thankful in your life- together with the kids as well !

    Reply

  • Do hope all moms had an awesome year and my wish for you is to have an even better one. xo

    Reply

  • Ditching the mum guilt and asking for help when needed would be the hardest for me to do

    Reply

  • A good article,the main thing is to be true to yourself and enjoy life.


    • Yes. Realise how valuable you are and contribute to yourself. You will have more to give then.

    Reply

  • I dont mind trying but being an indian wife and everything it wont last more than a week…
    Hopefully it works this time with thi tips… I am gonna put the tips on my fridge in kitchen….????

    Reply

  • I like your tips and agree with them. I gave guilt the boot years ago – just so pointless and it gets you nowhere. I never keep score as the only person I compete with is me! I try and improve and push myself to live a life full of gratitude and positivity. Mindfulness is part of my daily life.

    Reply

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