There seems to be a lot of awareness and education in our school systems regarding online bullying and education on school bullying in general but is that enough?
We live in a monkey see monkey do world and a majority of what our children do in life is a learnt behaviour.
So where are our children learning to be so nasty and for bullying to be so rife that there needs to be education focussed just on that? Perhaps it is learnt in the playground or perhaps we should be pointing the finger at ourselves as parents.
I think the finger pointing needs to begin…
Yes I’m calling it, hate me for it, attack me for it but I’m well and truly over it! Cyber bullying is rife right now and not just with our school aged children. Us as adults, mothers, fathers, aunties and uncles, are being found guilty of this same act of nastiness. This is where our children are learning from and they are learning that it is okay to attack other people from behind a computer or phone screen.
There are thousands of examples out there I could use but this one caught my attention so I’m going to use it as an example.
Just last week I read an absolute tirade of attacks on a mother who posted a photo of some lip gloss she gave to her daughter as a reward for a job well done. That exact lip gloss leaked onto a dresser and stripped the paint off. Of course this mother wanted answers on what to do and to warn other mothers of this horrible product, so she posted a photo of the lip gloss sitting on top on the dresser with newly stripped paint underneath to Facebook and shared it on a public forum to get some awareness out there. While there was some absolute love and genuine help being offered, (bravo to you lot!), some mothers just got plain nasty! This is what I like to call ‘the mum war’.
Some accusing this mother of being a bad parent because she purchased a lip gloss for her daughter and think this is teaching her daughter to be materialistic too young. Others started an attack on this mother for giving her daughter the lip gloss as a reward without reading every single ingredient! (I mean who the hell has time for that sh*t anyway and who the f&*k can understand what the 15 letter long words mean anyway?) It was a reward for a job well done for goodness sake! This mother was looking for guidance and probably some positive mum chat to let her know that’s it’s ok and she’s not a bad parent! Don’t you think this poor lady felt bad enough after realising she had given this to her daughter who had been using it on her lips for days, and just by chance the lip gloss leaked and stripped the paint off her daughters’ dresser.
Where do we stand in society that this mother needed to be ripped a new one by people telling her she was a bad mother by not reading the ingredients on the lip gloss?
Did we not get taught that if you have nothing nice to say, don’t say anything at all? To modernise that phrase to the online life we live in I shall write, if you have nothing positive or constructive to put towards the conversation or post please scroll past instead!
I myself can be fussy about what products I let my children use but let’s be honest, who on this Earth actually reads every single label on every single thing they buy? Ok so I know a couple of people that come to mind that may do this but I mean, just because it says it’s natural and safe doesn’t always mean it is, so you’re damned if you do and damned if you don’t!
At the end of the day we live in 2016. Why the hell is something that can strip paint off a dresser allowed to be sold off shelves in Australia as a lip balm?! This is the gut wrenching question I got out of this mum war. This is not the mothers fault; this comes down to this product being approved for sale in Australia. Not just this product but thousands of other products as well!
To the people who thought it necessary to attack this mother for raising awareness on this dodgy lip gloss, I’m calling you on your bullsh*t and shame on you! Shame on you for not lifting this mother up when she needed it the most. Shame on you for teaching your children that cyber bullying is ok. And I would like to know, how you find time to read the ingredients on every single label you give to your children? (Seriously, I’d love to know. Your time management skills must be phenomenal!)
Every parenting decision that a mother, father or guardian make leaves them open to attack in today’s world, and there are no winners.
Social media and blogging have added a whole new dimension to the conflict between parents. No doubt I will have some form of abuse thrown at me once this goes live. The competition has extended beyond the stay at home parent or go back to work debate. The battles are not isolated to the comment sections of blog posts and news articles, or fights on Twitter either. Don’t even get me started on the school mum bitchiness that I have personally felt first hand!
None of us are perfect and nobody is a perfect parent. We all try our best, try and do what is best for our children and that should be enough.
Sometimes we come to social media for help or guidance and I ask that instead of knocking people down with horrible onslaughts and starting these mum wars how about we put a hand out and empower each other! Is it seriously too much to ask?
Do you have anything positive to add to this? Please share in the comments below.
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