The only person doing wrong in this situation is the teacher. I hope your daughter gets the help and support that she needs too. When I had to start a new school, I was told where to sit even though I came from a dysfunctional family and I was never given special treatment.

I think the person really at fault here is the teacher – she’s an adult and she’s doing a really bad job of supporting and teaching those girls.

I think the teacher has handled the situation very poorly. There are always three sides to a story, its realise which is the truth.
I think this young girl has hoodwinked a few people to get exactly what she wants and orchestred to get. No boundaries have been set at all by foster parents, teacher and children.

I don’t agree with Winny being given special treatment just because of her circumstances. This is giving her the green light to use her situation to her advantage throughout her life and to have a woah is me attitude to life. It wasn’t fair that your daughter was moved from her friend group just because this girl didn’t like her as much as the others, however your daughter should not make disrespectful comments to Winny about her circumstances, no one knows the full story about them. I sympathise with you about your daughter’s circumstances about the passing of her brother, but you or your daughter would not like it if some one said disrespectful things about your situation.

No one here has behaved without cause for reproach, and I think it needs resolution from above . I don’t agree with the teacher but the language the mother has used describing Winnt’s family background has been echoed by the daughter, which isn’t helping at all.

I think the headmaster should be called into this situation and a solution for everyone worked out. Both Winny, your daughter and the teacher have been in the wrong during this saga.
Maybe a compromise of seating where half of the original group sit together and the other half sit together should have been reached.
I don’t blame the mother for trying to assist in this situation, but it has certainly grown out of all proportion now.

I don’t think the mother should be encouraging her daughter to say unkind things by not reprimanding her/ making her apologise. Yes, the teacher is very much in the wrong here by giving special allowances, but I think both girls need to be sat down together with the principal to mediated so they can sort out their differences. The teacher also needs to come up with a different seating plan that is a compromise that works for everyone.

Yeah no, sorry but this teacher should have clear boundaries and not just change things from sympathy. All children need to be treated equally and it’s definitely not fair on the child that was removed from her seat.

I personally think kids should be moved on a regular basis in class so there is no favouritism and kids can learn to share with other students instead of having clicky little groups. It seems Winny, your daughter and the teacher need to come to a solution that suits all.

Your daughter has obviously reached her breaking point, good on her for fighting back and standing up for herself. Seems a bit unfair she should be removed from her friend group

Such a tricky situation

Hmm, quite honestly it sounds like there has been bad behaviour all around. Was your daughter provoked? Yes. However, while your daughter shouldn’t have been moved from her entire friend group in such a way, neither was her comment to Winny kind or necessary, it also is a form of bullying.
At this point I think Senior School Leaders like the Principal and, if there is one, School Counsellor should be involved. It also sounds like the class teacher needs some better strategies for coping with who sits where and manipulative/disruptive behaviours.

The teacher excusing Winny’s behaviours is teaching her to be a brat to get what she wants.
This child is not being taught how to be caring, courteous, kind and thoughtful. Instead shes being taught how to bully, step all over people and using her disadvantages to treat people with disrespect. Big thumbs down to the teacher.

Being a foster child and having a hard life is no excuse and the teacher taking winny’s side is not professional nor acceptable. Why should your daughter feel left out and having to move desks. I would ask for a review. It feels more like the teacher punishing your child for another childs lie. I would take this matter further and address your points. This also encourages winny to continue his behaviour knowing she will get what she wants because of her personal circumstances

There are no excuses but there is context – I think of a child doesn’t feel safe because of the actions of another person (student or staff) that is not ok and the behaviour needs to be addressed with supports in place for all parties to ensure it is not repeated

Being a foster child is no excuse and I believe the teacher handled the situation inappropriately and caused a lot of distress. I really don’t know how the situation can be sorted out but I think the daughter should apologise to Winny. What she said was horrible.

Unfortunately there are always those out there who are ready to blame their behaviour on everything/everyone else rather than taking responsibility for their own actions; be it race, religion or upbringing. If it is not nipped in the bud early, the young bully grows into an adult bully.
Some of the other comments listed object to your daughter’s retort to the bully; but who out there hasn’t lashed out either physically or verbally when hurt?
Good luck, I feel for you (and actually for the bully too, I think there is a lot of anger bottled up there).

The teacher is not dealing with this well. Whinny’s behaviour is unacceptable and she should not be “rewarded” for it. However, your daughter should apologise for her remarks about Winny’s parents.

It was unfair for your daughter to be isolated for no reason. The teacher should have changed the whole class around and split the group in two so nobody was left out. Having said that, your daughters comments regarding Winnys parents were totally unacceptable.

There should not be fixed seats for the entire year. When my daughter was in primary school the teacher used some sort of random seat generator app which randomly selected students’ names and they sat together for that week. It gave the students a chance to get to know classmates they would not otherwise sit next to. Perhaps this might be a solution?