Hello!

Today I had a Doctor’s appointment in the city so grabbed a lift with my husband who works at World Square. As I walked around the city with my youngest toddler (14 months old) in tow, I realised that the city has become an intimidating and alien place to me now. I felt like a fish out of water.

Pushing along my pram, dressed in comfy trousers, a t-shirt and flip-flops (‘thongs’ to any Aussies reading this or Havaianas to anyone else).

Havaianas, AKA Thongs, AKA FlipFlops

It was as though I’d entered a parallel universe. Everyone was bustling around with such purpose, as though they knew something I didn’t or were part of something I wasn’t.

Hustle and bustle in the big, bad city

My husband has recently started a new job so he took me to his office to meet his work colleagues. I hadn’t planned on this and felt a little panicked that I looked rather like a homeless person he’d dragged off the street. I quickly ran my fingers through my knotty hair. I then did the obligatory once over check that all was in order (i.e. no sick on me, no food splattering on me, bra wasn’t on full display – my toddler has a tendency to yank my top down in her quest for milk, no milk leakage and flies were up), all good. I was relieved to have the remnants of nail polish on my toes from a rare night out a few days ago.

We walked into the smart, modern, stylish offices and I felt a little weird again. In my head I stuck out like a sore thumb, I shouldn’t be here in these smart offices with these busy and important people. I’m just a stay at home mum! Everyone was of course utterly lovely and welcoming, particularly excited by the presence, distraction and novelty of having a toddler in the office.

But it got me thinking, what is it about becoming a mum and having a certain amount of time out of the ‘paid workforce’ that makes us feel like worthless beings, no longer fit to enter the doors of the corporate world?

With 15 years experience in HR and recruitment, I spent a lot of time wearing suits and working in offices. I have worked in big cities in England such as Manchester and Newcastle. A year of my life in Australia involved working in Sydney’s CBD, I got to know (and love) the city well during that time. Today made me more aware than ever how different my life has become. Since exiting the corporate world in 2012 to go on maternity leave with my first baby (minus a brief stint in-between children for a couple of months), my life has changed considerably.

It’s challenging, fun, monotonous, rewarding and stressful – but in different ways.

I was lucky enough to enjoy most of the jobs I had throughout my career. That said, I do remember times when I wished I could pack it all in. I thought the role of being a mum would be easier, rewarding, fun; and I was definitely in favour of having no one to answer to.

I had a lot to learn.

Being a mum is the toughest, most challenging job I have ever done! Sleep routines, sleep deprivation, cleaning, making food, changing nappies, washing – at times it takes monotony to a whole new level. And as for having no one to answer to, Sir Alan Sugar has a lot to learn from my 2 strong minded and bossy toddlers.

However, the rewards of being a stay at home mum are immense. The happiness I feel when I hear my children laughing, being there to see them take their first steps or utter their first words, the smiles they give me when they do something silly or say something cute and the way they make me feel when they run into my arms to cuddle me. These are the things that make the hard work and monotony worthwhile. Oh, and the fact that I rarely have to wear make-up, brush my hair or dress in high heels anymore!

I don’t intend to be a stay at home mum forever. I miss having a different kind of purpose and being meaningful in other ways. I enjoyed the social aspect of going out to work and the independence. I would also like to contribute financially to our family.

But for the time being this is my life, and it’s one I love and am truly grateful for. I’m sure one day the city and the corporate world may become familiar to me again. It might take a little adjusting to get back into the swing of it and require a new wardrobe!

Can you relate to this? Please share your thoughts in the comments below.

Image courtesy of Shutterstock.com

  • Babies have a knack of either vomitting or soiling their nappy at the most inconvenient times. I have been caught out with other peoples’ babies on a few occasions. It is also embarrassing when you are babysitting, decide to venture out, you are only going to be a few minutes, not very experienced and decide to grab the nappy bag. I’ll leave the rest to your imagination.

    Reply

  • I’ve felt the very same having gone to the CBD after a period of time away from it. I didn’t have my son with me, but I still felt as though I stuck out somewhat.

    Reply

  • I concur!!

    Reply

  • Embrace the thongs. Once you’re a mum you’re in the secret club where you realise this is the most meaningful job and everyone else in the club knows that it doesn’t matter what you look like, just that the kid is fed and happy!

    Reply

  • I’m actually making an effort to dress more smartly even though I’ll be at home for the foreseeable future.

    Reply

  • I am more happy in my little suburb and its such more friendly than the city

    Reply

  • I’ve never felt at hone in the city, I’m country thru and thru. But it doesn’t sadden me, I much prefer my life

    Reply

  • Actually, no, I can’t relate to this. I’m a SAHM and when I go into the city I actually feel sorry for all those sad faces walking past me. I feel a little smug in my happy little world.

    Reply

  • I can relate to this. I had to go into the city for a job when my daughter was 6 months. I felt so out of place even though I had previously been in corporate. It’s amazing how we change

    Reply

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