With Fathers day a little under a month away, it’s time to start thinking about what to get dad.

Aside from presents though, how about you teach your kids a few of these ‘Dad jokes’ to give him a taste of his own medicine!

Q) Milk is the fastest liquid on earth…

A) Its Past-ur-eysed before you even see it

Q) Our wedding was so beautiful…
A) Even the cake was in tiers!

Q) What did the dad’s tie say to his neck?
A) Can I hang around?

Q) What’s ET short for?
A) Because he’s only got little legs

Q) Why do crabs never give to charity?
A) Because they’re shellfish

Q) Why did the octopus beat the shark in a fight?
A) Because it was well armed

Q) A sandwich walks into a bar, the bartender says…
A) “Sorry, we don’t serve food here”

Q) What do you do when a blonde throws a grenade at you?
A) Pull the pin and throw it back!

Q) Why don’t skeletons ever go trick or treating?
A) Because they have no-body to go with

Q) What did the 0 say to the 8?
A) Nice belt!

Q) A man walks into a bar  and orders a helicopter flavour of chips, the bartender says…
A) “Sorry mate, we only do plain”

Q) I’m reading a book on the history of glue…
A) I can’t put it down

Q) Where does batman go to the bathroom?
A) The Bat-room

Q) What cheese can never be yours?
A) Nacho Cheese!

Q) What type of organisation is Atheism?
A) A non prophet one

So there are a few bad dad jokes to add to your arsenal this fathers day. Comment your BEST ‘Dad joke’ below!
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  • Yup….they are all 100% Dad jokes


  • oh dear, very lame fathers day jokes- I LOVE THEM!


  • Just what I need! More bad jokes for my son and his Dad to torment me with !!!


  • Some old, some new but still funny


  • My kids love jokes, especially my son !


  • I always find entertaining reading Dad’s jokes. This is one I love:

    Why did the phone wear glasses? It lost all of its contacts.


  • Q. What did the farmer say to the cow on top of the barn roof?
    A. Get down!


  • Love them all.


  • These are typically corny jokes which are great for dads. My husbands favourite: Why did 6 cry? Because 7 ate 9.


  • My son will love these new jokes to add to his repertoire. He’s in need of some new ones!!


  • An interesting lot there are, thanks.


  • Haha i got a laugh out of these.


  • Oh I love a good (bad) dad joke heheheh I have had a few eye rolls in my time hahahah


  • Have to show this to my son, he’ll love these ????


  • What’s brown and sticky?
    A stick


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