February 12, 2020


With the amount of  “couple time” that most Australian parents get, it’s no wonder that Valentine’s Day is taking a back seat for many this year.

Tiredness, tight budgets and a lack of babysitters are also wrecking the romantic plans of many couples.

Valentine’s plans

We recently asked our members about their Valentine’s plans.

Sadly, 30% of women say their partner forgets Valentine’s Day altogether.   It’s no wonder then that 16% admit to buying their own Valentine’s present!

Despite the Fifty Shades of Grey revolution, there’s still far more interest in romance than sex.  Worn out mothers say they’d far prefer a nice dinner or relaxing day at the spa than sexy presents such as lingerie.

While one in four women would like flowers, only one in fifty wants underwear.  Adult toys were an even less popular gift idea.

“We can’t be spontaneous anymore. We have to close and or lock doors before romantic activities too!” one mother lamented.

Little Cupids

Given how little alone-time most parents are getting, it’s no surprise that Valentine’s Day passes some couples by.

45% of respondents spend less than once a month together alone, without the kids. And 16% only get one day per month. But a lucky 19% spend two or more times together alone per week!

Many parents admit that their lives revolve around children now. Some are even turning Valentine’s Day into a family celebration, with children helping pick gifts out, baking cakes, sharing Valentine’s chocolates, and even coming along to a Valentine’s meal.

“It’s completely changed the way we do everything,” another mother confessed. “We can’t afford babysitting, and with three kids under seven and no family support, it’s pretty tricky organising time together at all let alone without kids – and feeling relaxed and sexy at the same time!”

Romance still endures

The good news is that despite the pressures, most women say they are satisfied with the level of romance in their lives.  And nine out of ten plan to get their partners a Valentine’s gift, with cologne and clothing the top choices after a romantic meal.

But the most encouraging comment came from a lady who reminds us that love, romance and family can all co-exist.

“Having children hasn’t changed a thing. Valentine’s Day is still special even after 29 years of marriage.”

How do you celebrate Valentine’s Day? Tell us in the comments below.

  • Valentine’s Day meant nothing to to me before I became one of a couple, that view hasn’t changed and us unlikely to


  • He took the day off work, kids were in school or daycare, we then had our special time during the nlda and once everyone was home.were made a.spexial dinner and had it as a family. We created out family together, we should celebrate the love day together.


  • I didn’t celebrate I was the family childminder for the night


  • We never celebrated it – not fussed


  • We always celebrated Valentine’s Day until my husband passed away. Even once we had children we never stopped celebrating this special day.


  • Meh, a non event.


  • We don’t make a fuss about Valentine’s day. We enjoy our time together at night when the kids ho to bed and it works well for us.


  • Our Anniversary falls a week after Valentine’s Day, so we have a double celebration on the weekend between. Hubby always buys me flowers and we always go out for a romantic dinner.


  • I have been married 39 years and it is still wonderful to receive chocolates and flowers on Valentine’s day. Yes we are all busy but it only takes a moment on Valentine’s day to say I love you.


  • I have been married for 10.5 years now and have 2 kids. There is not an awful lot of romance in our lives. Sometimes hubby thinks to buy flowers on special occasions but I am lucky to get them once a year and it’s never spontaneous- not sure if I will get anything tomorrow. I am having to ask about if we are actually going to go out and do something. Normally if anything happens it’s because I organise it.


  • We’re about to be married for 30 years so I say… Valentine’s Day is worth acknowledging. It doesn’t have to be a big celebration, just an acknowledgement or love. I’ve simply got my man a card, so it is just recognition of the day and the love that we still share. It doesn’t have to be OTT. We did that back in our teens and early 20s.


  • We do a card and a wee gift and often I do that for the kids too. But we do a wee gift spontaneous all year round too


  • Doesn’t have to be a grand thing. I’m just happy if hubby brings home my favourite foods!


  • My husband and I started “dating” on feb 13th so we are more likely to celebrate that than Valentine’s Day. But we do tend to combine the occasions. We don’t do anything fancy. We get dinner from out, maybe Chinese or KFC, and don’t get romantic gifts. This year we are decking the backyard and calling it a valentine gift. Beats having more stuff and adds value to the house!


  • When we first started dating we did Valentine’s presents but it is also my birthday so we do something for that instead


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