A grandad-to-be says he’s been blindsided by his daughter and her husband, who expect him to look after their baby once its born and they return to work.
Fifty two-year-old Bobby says he’s raised his children, and shouldn’t be expected to raise his grandchildren. But thinks he may have gone too far by telling his daughter 27-year-old daughter Amanda she shouldn’t have become pregnant if she didn’t expect to raise her own baby.
“Currently Amanda and Chris (her husband) aren’t that focused on their future, mostly on having fun and doing things ‘while they’re still young’,” Bobby explained on reddit.
“There’s nothing wrong with that, in my opinion, and I think that young people should have that kind of period in their life, especially after the pandemic. I got a call from Amanda. She and Chris told me how they have taken several tests and confirmed that Amanda is pregnant! They would be hosting an announcement dinner, but wanted immediate family to know right away. They could barely wait as they had been trying since they were married. (Note that this was an intended pregnancy) I told them I was thrilled to be a grandpa.”
Fast forward to the dinner party, and the the grandpa-to-be says there was nothing but happiness and excitement at their baby news. Until he overheard a conversation that involved him.
“I didn’t sign up for a new baby. I’m done with all that.”
“Chris and Amanda were talking to a friend and Chris made a comment along the lines of, ‘Good thing that Bobby will watch the baby while we’re at work!’ I was confused and asked what they were talking about. Amanda revealed that she and Chris were expecting me to always watch the baby while they were working and so they could have ‘fun time’ while not working.
“Now I love my children and will never regret being their dad. But I didn’t sign up for a new baby. I’m done with all that. I want to enjoy my retirement and be free without any underage children. I explained this to Amanda and Chris, also that there are many great daycare options in the area.
“Amanda began to cause a scene because, ‘You told me you were thrilled to be a grandpa!’ I responded that exactly, I was thrilled to be a grandpa, not a parent to this baby. She said that I should help out since I don’t have to worry about working (I receive a pension) and that she’s young and these are supposed to be the best years of her life, and she thinks it’s unfair that she and Chris’s life should ‘be all about a baby’.
“I was very frank and responded that, ‘Amanda, of course, you and Chris’s life is going to ‘be all about a baby. That’s what it means to be a parent. You should not have gotten pregnant if you just expected someone else to raise your child’. Amanda yelled at me, ‘Don’t be surprised when I put you in a shitty nursing home’.
“My son, Michael, says that I was harsh in my delivery but not my message. My son, Nathan, agreed that Amanda and Chris are expecting too much and it was irresponsible to purposely get pregnant when they believe they don’t have time to raise a baby. My sister, Sandra, however, told me my comment was ‘callous and misogynistic’ and I haven’t raised a newborn in twenty years and don’t realise how much harder being a parent has gotten. And I can agree to start providing at least four days of childcare per week then go from there. Multiple family members are agreeing with Sandra.”
Now Bobby wants to know if he’s being an a**hole in this situation. Let us know what you think in the comments below.We may get commissions for purchases made using links in this post. Learn more.