An upset mum says she won’t allow her teen daughter’s friend back into her house, until she apologises for making fun of her weight.

The 37-year-old mum-of-two says her 14-year-old daughter has finally made a friend after going through a period of being ‘socially awkward’.

“We’ve had her tested since we suspected her of being on the spectrum. Turns out she isn’t on the spectrum; she’s just a natural introvert,” the mum explained on reddit.

“However, this year in school we were thrilled when our daughter made a new friend her age since that is an area in which she struggles. Long story short she recently invited her new friend over (with our approval) to have dinner at our house and then spend the night.”

The woman and her 41-year-old husband were both excited about their daughter making a new friend, and decided to have their usual family dinner when she came over.

“My husband is usually the cook in the family and this night was no exception; he made us all a really nice meal. During the course of said meal I asked my daughter’s friend; ‘Are you enjoying the food?’ She responded ‘Yes! (Your husband) is a great cook! No wonder you’ve ended up a bigger woman.’

“The room got quiet for several moments. My husband tried to laugh it off and change the subject but I wasn’t having it. The girl had just levelled a completely uncalled-for insult at me. My daughter’s friend seemed to realise that she’d messed up but she didn’t say anything else. We finished an awkward dinner in mostly silence and my daughter’s friend did stay the night.”

A couple of months have gone past, and her daughter has once again asked if this same friend can come over again. But the mum isn’t ready to let go of what happened, saying her friend can only come over, if she apologises for what she said.

“When our daughter asked what I meant I reminded her of what her friend had said. My daughter responded that it was over and she didn’t want to bring it up again.”

“She then went to her father and asked. He said ‘sure’ but she then told him what I’d said. He came to me and said: ‘[Daughter’s friend] just felt awkward and tried to make a joke. It didn’t land. For the sake of our daughter can’t you just let it go?’

“Yes, I could, but the thing is that I just want an apology from the girl. I need to see that she understands how rude she was before I can get on board with her and my daughter hanging out.

“My husband says that I am being weird for insisting on an apology from a 14 year-old, especially since that girl is such a good friend of our daughter. I think it’s weird that I’m still waiting for an apology from that same girl. Seriously. That’s all I need. I just need to know that any friend of my daughter is willing to own up to her screw ups.”

Now she wants to know if she’s in the wrong for expecting an apology. Let us know what you think in the comments below. 

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  • Call it out by all means, but I don’t know that banning her from your house is the best approach.


  • I can definitely understand the sentiment behind this


  • I’d let it go and for the sake of your daughter give her friend a second chance. Hopefully she’s smart enough to not comment again.


  • I kinda think you’re over doing it. Let it go, she’s 14 for heavens sake. At least let her have a second chance, don’t be so sensitive, for your daughters sake……encourage the only friendship she has


  • As the adult you should get over it for the sake of your daughter’s friendship, as you’ve said, she struggles with making friends. I think it’s more important to put your ego aside.


  • Your and adult she is a child. Get over it. Your daughter as at last made a friend and she’s happy its not all about you. Kids make stupid comments every day and if it was such an issue you should have said something then. I would have laughed it off. Seems like you put your feelings ahead of your daughter and that’s not right.


  • I think 14 is old enough to learn what to do when you make a blunder in a social situation. Apologize! If nothing is said she will think it’s ok to say hurtful things to someone in front of others.


  • I would have totally ignored it


  • Your daughter has made a friend and is happy, I would be focusing on that and the comment came on incorrectly out of a 14 years old mouth. I’d move on past it. She probably has long forgotten about it even if you haven’t.


  • I think we need to take the friend’s age into account. At 14 sometimes phrases get blurted out that meant no harm. The Mother could have handled it better as an adult, laugh it off, or say to the friend ” I think you could have phrased that a bit better”.


  • Oh no. It’s such a tough age. I think communication is key here


  • I think you need to realise that this is a 14 year old girl and often they say things that come out wrong. I’m sure you’ve sometimes said something and it has come out completely different to the way you intended it. Let it go, and be the adult

    • I agree with letting it go and giving it no value.


  • Well I would have to say how rude is the friend and I dont think I would let her back into my house either sorry


  • I don’t think she’s going to apologise. I understand it was embarrassing and hurtful, but sadly, I think you just need to be the adult and move on.


  • Children and adults say lots of different things and make comments often without realising impacts. Best to shake it off and move on, life is way too short for slights and angst.


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