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Husbands cause mothers to stop prematurely because they want their wives back.

Breastfeeding counsellor and National Childbirth Trust (NCT) teacher, Jeanette Kupfermann, says men are desperate for breastfeeding to end because they really just want their wives all to themselves again.

Jeanette writes for Daily Mail, “I’d been a volunteer breastfeeding counsellor and National Childbirth Trust (NCT) teacher ever since my daughter was born in 1967. Over the years, I’d seen a shift away from childbirth and parenting being seen as a women-only club, as more and more fathers joined their wives at ante-natal classes and in birthing suites.

‘It gave me a revelatory insight into the psyche of the new father that is so rarely witnessed.

‘I was rapidly coming to the conclusion it wasn’t a hankering to nurture the baby himself, or to give his wife a break, that was fuelling this poor dad’s plea, but something else entirely.

‘He wanted his wife back.

‘Tired of being on the periphery while the needy infant was permanently clamped to his wife’s body, sapping her libido, he was desperate for the whole breastfeeding business to end.

‘And it makes me wonder if it is the real, unspoken reason why so many women choose to give up breastfeeding prematurely. We learned this week that just 0.5 per cent of British women are still doing it after 12 months, the lowest rate in the world.

‘This prompted the Royal College of Paediatrics and Child Health to call for pupils as young as 11 to be taught about breastfeeding to help ‘normalise’ it and change our society’s attitude.

‘But how often have I heard mothers complain their husband was ‘jealous’ of her breastfeeding, making disapproving and subtly undermining comments?

‘A partner’s support is fundamental to a woman’s ability to breastfeed, and the lack of it, I believe, is one of the biggest factors in our disappointingly low breast-feeding rate.

‘Often, this leads to women panicking that their husbands will seek comfort elsewhere, or immerse themselves in online porn.

‘It can lead to feelings of guilt and inadequacy on both sides, and contribute to post-natal depression — and the abandonment of breastfeeding.

‘We have to make the father, as well as the mother, realise that it’s OK to let other things go for a while, that their sex repertoire will undergo changes.

“Intimacy will return and often couples rediscover each other with renewed rigour and passion that comes with having forged an even closer bond as loving and supportive parents.”

Read the full post here

Did your partner support your breastfeeding journey or pressure you to stop?

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  • any kind and supportive fathers and husbands would surely understand that the needs of the child has to come first and would not be pressuring and pushy. this is a very selfish move, i think.

    Reply

  • The guys can always skip the “breast part” and enjoy the rest of the experience.
    He should think about that before pregnancy.

    Reply

  • Luckily my husband supported me completely! It’s terrible when one man doesn’t!

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  • My husband supported me fully.
    My friend shared her husband really wanted her body and her breasts back for himself after a period of breastfeeding.

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  • Think that this is a reaction similar to the teach from 11 years old theory. Most men are not at all unhappy about breastfeeding a baby – think it rather turns them on not off having sex with their wives.

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  • Garbage – never felt pressure from hubby to give up….

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  • Sure, he wanted to be able to with them again but he supported my breastfeeding journey the entire time and is happy to do it again

    Reply

  • What a load of rubbish! I’ve never met a man who resented his wife for breastfeeding. As for it preventing her libido returing, wasn’t it this site a week or so ago that posted the story about the woman who had sex while breastfeeding? I don’t even know any men who would be brave enough to even suggest they’re sick of their wives breastfeeding. Mother in laws yes, partners no.

    Reply

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