When you believe, know and treat yourself as ‘loved’ you’ll understand and accept it as the ONLY foundation on which unconditional love, compassion and a drive to serve others in your unique way evolves.
The perception that loving yourself first is the key to being able to do the most good for yourself, your family and others; doesn’t come naturally especially to us mothers.
We’ve been conditioned to think that self-love is selfish and the only good we do in the world is when we give and do for others. We accept the constant feeling of exhaustion from doing and giving way too much out of love and duty, as the norm.
Yet as young women we made time to treat and pamper ourselves, to do the things we knew would make us feel good, to hang out with our friends and participate in the things we enjoyed.
Should anything get in the way of our plans we would move hell or high water to achieve it. Failing that there was always ‘plan b’ which involved some kind of manipulation of parents or grandparents or the bribing of siblings. Nothing and I mean NOTHING could get in the way of a determined young lady!
Our responsibilities grow while self-love and self-care shrink
Why then as mothers do we not have the same fortitude for taking care of ourselves and getting our needs met?
As adults we take on the roles of wife, mother, employee or business owner, school/community committee member, chief fundraiser as well as ‘extra-curricular’ activities for school and sporting events and more. ‘Wham,’ almost overnight our responsibilities grow while the level of ‘self-love and self-care’ shrink. Do you see yourself in this picture?
The relationship with yourself is a life long commitment;- when you fail to care and love yourself you end up resenting your responsibilities including the care of your little ‘darlings’ and other loved ones. When you disregard your needs you tell the world that you are not worthy of love and care so it will give you exactly what you believe you deserve.
Make the time to pay regular attention to your self-care and be self-aware to do the things that keep you happy. Treating yourself with the love you bestow your family and staying happy is your responsibility not someone else’s. To end on another happy note, self-love ensures you contribute more generously, have endless energy and unlimited love without any resentment towards your little ‘darlings.‘
A happy well rounded family environment prioritizes the care, love and appreciation of each individual. This level of care is evident where-ever your children go. A ‘happy mummy, fosters a happy family.’