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Melbourne blogger, Olivia White, 27, tackles ‘six total BS misconceptions about motherhood’.

These include the idea that ‘it will all come naturally’ and the common perception that all new mothers do is have coffee dates and shop.

Her warts and all post was shared on her Facebook page House of White.

Olivia writes,

“I’m gonna have a lovely natural birth drug free, I am gonna breastfeed the shit out my baby, meet my GF’s for bulk coffee dates and look fabulous while I’m on Maternity leave – Motherhood will just come so naturally” – Me pre baby!”

Admitting, “Well didn’t I get a nice lovely slap in the face from reality once that big headed babe was ripped violently from my abdomen!”

Olivia shares, “Today, I’m busting six total BS misconceptions about motherhood! *Little spoiler, actually not you’re not alone!’

It will all come so naturally! Nope! Soz love it doesn’t! You will literally get home from the hospital and gaze into your baby’s eyes and go “So what the fuck do I do now?”. I’m pretty sure your baby does too?! When a midwife is shoving your nipple in their face, claiming “the baby knows what to do” I’m almost certain the kids lying there going “lady why you shoving this thing at me?”. No one’s got any clue!

It’s all coffee dates and shopping! Hahahahahahahaha HA HA that’s a hilarious joke! To anyone who thinks it’s all cappuccinos and Kmart, you are sadly mistaken! I think it actually takes me about seven months to successfully catch up with someone, and even then we both leave early with screaming child(ren) in tow vowing never to set foot in a cafe again. Between trying to line up children’s nap times and not actually wanting to take your toddler to a public place, this is one big fat urban myth.

You are “just” a mum! This one really shits me! It’s as if once you become ‘mum’ people forget anything else. And should you god forbid try to retain some sense of identity, albeit go back to work or have dreams and aspirations, then you’re labelled selfish? I don’t think so mate!

There is a right and wrong way! Well if there is a right way I think I missed the memo?! A multi-billion dollar industry has been built on publishing books and articles that tell you exactly how to parent! Because babies and children are so textbook and all the same! *That was sarcasm for anyone not following along at home*

That you will always like your kids! Tell me this, if an adult came into your home and woke you up every hour of the night, only to then spend the entire day throwing things at you, screaming at you and telling you that your cooking is ‘yukky’ and not once ever letting you pee alone – would you like them?

I mean yes I know, they’re only kids, they don’t mean it, they don’t know any better – blaa blaa blaa! But you can love the shit out of your kids and not ‘like’ them at the same time!

You will be able to do it all! Look, I’m sure there is some mum out there who does! But for the majority of us it will feel as if one or more balls will always on the floor! And while some of us might try project that we do ‘have it together’ – we don’t! AND THAT’S ABSOLUTELY NORMAL! Asking for help doesn’t make you weak, it doesn’t make you a bad mother – It makes you human!”

AMEN! Thanks for telling it how it really is, Olivia! I think we can all do with a good dose of reality.

What else would you add?

Share your comments below.

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  • yeah your whole outlook on life does change when you become a mum and you change and grow as a person. You become stronger, not weaker and you wear your heart on your shoulder. You never know what to expect until you become a mum. Just enjoy the ride, it goes real fast!

    Reply

  • Good on her for being her own person, not trying to be someone else or how people say she should be. Whether you agree with her or not, its admirable.

    Reply

  • None of these are news to me. Motherhood is a constant struggle of balance and guilt and trying to get it right

    Reply

  • Lol. You can have it all!! You just can’t have it all at the same time.

    Reply

  • Love it. Always makes me happy to read stories like this: honest, no mucking around, reality.

    Reply

  • So true ! Giving birth and motherhood isn’t always this idyllic sweet fragrances and moonshine !

    Reply

  • Very few Mums manage with no pain relief. If a Mum is in constant very strong pain she can become so tense that she doen’t relax her muscles at all between contractions. Yes, if your baby is too big you are going to need a c-section, risk extreme damage to your body – perhaps even your baby – especially if the head gets wedged.

    Reply

  • Sadly social media perpetuates these myths, nobody wants to admit the bad stuff (I do) and they only post the good stuff, and if you are ever brave enough to post the real stuff, there’s so many arm chair critics it’s so exhausting (it’s as if they forget what its like and go on the attack)
    The truth is it’s exhausting and relentless, you never clock off, but we have these beautiful amazing little humans, if we just let some expectations go and let it happen,

    Reply

  • I told my daughter -in-law that when the time came that she was thinking about bouncing her baby off a wall, ring me and bring her over for a break. She looked at me in horror and I laughed. Fast forward to after the birth… A late night phone call, she’s in tears, baby screaming in the background. Now she understood my comment. Good mums ask for help when they need it. Babies may be able to scream for hours with only a short nap now and then. Mums can not continue to cope with just those short breaks and the rest of life to deal with.


    • I wish more mothers/mother-in-laws did this – well done.

    Reply

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