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Mum explains why she doesn’t expect her children to share with others.

Alanya Kolberg, posted a lengthy explanation on Facebook that has since been shared almost 220,000 times, 246,000 reactions and has almost 700 comments.

Ms Kolberg said her son was approached by at least six boys at once when he was playing with his toys in the playground.

They “demanded” they share his transformer, Minecraft figure and truck, leaving him visibly overwhelmed.

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“He clutched them to his chest as the boys reached for them. He looked at me. “You can tell them no, Carson” I said, “Just say no. You don’t have to say anything else,” Ms Kolberg wrote in the post.

“Of course, as soon as he said no, the boys ran to tattle to me that he was not sharing. I said, “He doesn’t have to share with you. He said no. If he wants to share, he will.”

Ms Kolberg said she received some “dirty” looks from other parents.

“If I, an adult, walked into the park eating a sandwich, am I required to share my sandwich with strangers in the park? No!”

“Would any well-mannered adult, a stranger, reach out to help themselves to my sandwich, and get huffy if I pulled it away? No again.”

“So really, while you’re giving me dirty looks, presumably thinking my son and I are rude, whose manners are lacking here? The person reluctant to give his three toys away to six strangers, or the six strangers demanding to be given something that doesn’t belong to them, even when the owner is obviously uncomfortable?”

Do you agree with this mum’s opinion?

Share your comments below.

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  • yeah that was her and her child’s decision so it is no big deal to say no and other kids will learn that they won’t always get what they want either. It is someone else’s belongings and they shouldn’t be expected to just have access.

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  • I absolutely agree with this mums decision. And her examples about adult strangers not sharing is a perfect example. It’s one thing to teach our children to share with their friends, but I would never encourage my daughter to lend her toys to a stranger. If she says no I will stand by her.

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  • This at least set’s him up for not sharing food later on at school. Sharing should be a loving gesture, not a forced one.

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  • I agree that sharing is important but at the same time these are his toys and he has the final say. How do you know they won’t break them or, worse yet, run away with them. I agree he should share if they come to his home as a friend but not to a complete stranger. I’m sure those people that glared at you wouldn’t make their children share things with strangers.

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  • You also don’t know what illness or worse still the other children may have.

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  • Sharing is an important part of a child’s development and also a n important lesson to learn to help them to fit into society. They might not have to share their lunch every day, but there will be situations in which they will need to share, like for instance sharing food with their kids, caring about those less fortunate.
    Yeah there are definitely lines here and maybe in the above situation the mother should have stepped in and said ‘okay you can have a turn for 2 minutes, then you and then you, etc.’ That way everyone can be happy. That being said I’m not sure how I’d feel about strangers sharing my kids toys, that’s a little weird and a little rude on their part. My daughter does, however, often have to share with kids in church who like to play with her toys.

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  • Yes, I totally agree with this mum’s opinion.
    I often discourage my kids to bring toys to the playground or shops. Things get lost or others get jealous, causing upset by my own kids and by the other kids.

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  • good on her and I must say, I totally agree with her.

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  • Good on her. Very well said

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  • I absolutely loved this post and totally agreed with this Mum. I totally agree, it’s all about teaching your child manners and respect, and role modelling that for your kids.

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  • I totally agree with this mother. Kids need to learn manners like asking nicely if they can share someones toys but also accepting the decision of the other child if they don’t feel comfortable with sharing.

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  • If they are snatching and being aggressive then I can understand though I have taught my daughter ‘sharing is caring’ but that is when it is done nicely.

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  • She is right. People need to stop only thinking of themselves.

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  • I completely agree with this mother. I didn’t force my little ones to share either. I’m also put off by the other kids breaking my kids toys, not keen on sharing for this reason either

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  • Sharing is very important but in this case l can understand as they weren’t his friends.

    Reply

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