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When Australian midwife Aliza Carr shared a lighthearted video of herself trying to soothe her baby on a 14 hour flight, she never imagined it would attracted thousands of vicious comments, condemning her behaviour.

The Instagram video shows Aliza, who owns Franjos Kitchen and Bumpnbub, bouncing her baby up and down in a carrier on a plane, with the tongue-in-cheek caption:

“How to get a toned butt and legs? Take a four-month-old, that only sleeps in the carrier, to 5+ countries in a month …”

She continued the conversation in her video caption, saying,

“Okay – I joke, but in all seriousness, even as a midwife, I thought the most strenuous part of becoming a mama – was pregnancy. And for some, that is the case, but for me it was 100% in the postpartum phase. It was this, right here. The hours and hours each day of baby wearing my little koala never getting a break.

“I remember this flight, it was 14+ hours straight and I remember taking Panadol for my butt and leg muscles that were aching #Mumlife”

The video attracted some supportive comments, but there were also hundreds of comments criticising Aliza for her actions. Here’s a taste of the vitriol she received:

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But plenty of other jumped in to Aliza’s defence, pointing out that if she was a dad, she would have been praised for soothing her baby for hours on end.

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Aliza has since revealed that the comments left her shocked.

“Comments full of hatred, very emotionally charged responses are what shocked me the most,” Aliza said.
“The opinion that a mum soothing and responding to her baby, can be seen as ‘spoiling’ or being ‘manipulated’ by her baby is archaic, incorrect and damaging to new parents.

“We know that 1:5 women experience a perinatal mental health condition, and nasty comments that add no value except to tear women down do nothing but damage and the constant mum shaming from highly opinionated individuals, who consider themselves parenting experts, largely who have either never had children, or if they have – raised them 30+ years ago is exhausting and can be damaging to new mothers,” she continued.

“There are more positive comments, and comments defending me than anything else. Nobody is more passionate than an angry mum who feels they are being vilified for responding to their baby in the best way that they know how. So many mums can see themselves in me in this video, and that’s why it’s got so much traction globally,” she said.

What do you think of the situation? Let us know in the comments below. 

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  • This isn’t right, I feel for the Mum. No one benefits from this.

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  • Flights are never slient and calm environments. Upgrade if you want peace

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  • Not a fan of mum-shaming, the pressures and challenges of motherhood are often overlooked and underappreciated. Life is hard enough, lets just support each other.

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  • Ok unpopular opinion coming in. It said she visited 5+ countries. Why? I can’t imagine wanting to take a 4 month old baby on holiday or working holiday with me to 5 countries in one month. Is it really necessary? Never mind your fellow passengers what about the baby who’s had to go through it?

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  • I’ve noticed that a lot of child free people online are becoming very vocal with anti child opinions. A lot of vitriol and aggression. You just need to ignore it if your going to put yourself out there.

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  • What a shame nobody gave her a break. Maybe they could have had the magic touch to settle her baby. Kindness and generosity would be nice to hear about.

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  • Babies cry. There’s only so much you can do about it. On the other hand, if she was standing near one row for the entire trip, that’s wrong. She should have moved around a bit to give those passengers a break.

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  • I understand the frustration of other passengers but also the frustration and desperation of person travelling with baby,toddler etc. I think empathy and human decency are called for

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  • I have travelled with a baby and also with a toddler. It’s not easy, trying to keep them quiet on a plane trip so as not to annoy anyone. I have also travelled without children and fully sympathise with those that do, often offering any help I can

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  • I can’t believe people can be so nasty when all she was doing was trying to settle her baby. If I’d been on the flight I would have been a bit miffed but I would also have understood.

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  • I can see both sides and just glad i wasn’t either party.

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  • One mama just doing her best. She’s not in someone’s leg room….you’d have to be a giraffe to need that much leg room! Give her a break or offer to help. No need for slaying words.

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  • I do understand where both sides are coming from but it’s best to just accept it as it is.

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  • Shame there was nasty words. Of course it wouldn’t be pleasant if a bubs was cranky on a flight but there is nothing you can do about it. A bubs will be loud no matter where the bubs is on the on the plane. Row A or row H.

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  • Unfortunately if you post on social media the consequences of doing so has both negative and positive remarks. Dont post if you dont want nasty feedback,
    Keep your thoughts private.

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  • I understand both sides, just wouldn’t feel the need to jump on line and comment.

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  • Although the sound of a crying baby always upsets me, I wouldn’t be bothered to reply on social media. In fact, I don’t use it at all.

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  • And slowly we’ll all stop using social media because of the online bullies, bigots, cowards and ill informed morans that live there.

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  • Things like this happen when people decide to post their lives on social media. It’s like opening a can of worms!

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  • Your mistake is to put this story in a public forum so all the bugs can come out and bite you. No wonder social media upsets so many people because so many people put the lives in it for other to judge .

    Reply

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