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The debate about homework has long raged, but one mum says the amount of after-school tasks her five-year-old is expected to do has given him anxiety, and she is ‘done’.

US-based mum Cayley shared a video on TikTok, explaining that she recently found out parents are able to ‘opt out’ of homework for their children.

“I didn’t know that until recently,” Cayley explained.

“I sent my son’s kindergarten teacher a cutesy little email saying, ‘I’m sorry. Based on the stress, mental, physical anxiety it’s causing my kid, we are done,’ ” she said.

@cayleyxox I hope it inspires more parents to do it for their children ❤️ #momsoftiktok ♬ original sound – cayleyxo

Cayley revealed her five-year-old had been given a packet of homework for the month of August, which consisted of about 15 double-sided pages. The frustrated mum says she’s been trying to do the homework with her son, but it’s causing him ‘so much mental stress.

“I feel so guilty for this. This morning we were sitting down and I told him you can’t even watch a show this morning, you can’t do anything, it’s going to be radio silence until you sit here and eat your breakfast and finish at least one or two pages of this. She said he started crying, which led Cayley to start crying.

“It was an emotional mess. I felt so guilty dropping him off at school,” she said. “He didn’t want to be there. For the last two weeks, he told me he doesn’t even like school and doesn’t want to be there anymore, which hurts my mama heart because you’re five. The only thing you should be worrying about is learning and what time snack time is.”

Cayley’s video, which has been viewed hundreds of thousands of times, was applauded by parents, who were shocked that five-year-old were being given homework.

“It’s crazy to me how different each country is. My son is in grade five and he hasn’t ever gotten homework, outside of ‘family’ related homework (think the ‘getting to know you’ pages).”

Even teachers were supportive of the mum opting out of homework for her son.

“So from a teacher perspective, that is way too much to do; however, l am a teacher, and do individual skills for kids to practice at home based on the child’s needs. We do a ton of hands on skills, but we are also teaching kids how to write first and last names, cutting skills, how to glue, how to hold a pencil and crayon, how to sit correctly, how to use the bathroom, how to hold a book, the difference between snacks in their lunchboxes and lunch in their lunchboxes and tons more things. This takes a good 2 months. Ask your teacher for more individual skills your child needs to work on. That’s a win/win for parent and student.”

Cayley has updated the situation with the teacher’s response, and it wasn’t what she was expecting.

The teacher said she’s never received any similar emails from other parents, and didn’t think she was giving out ‘that much work’.

Take a look at how the conversation went in the video below.

 

@cayleyxox Replying to @Austyn #momsoftiktok #momshelpingmoms ♬ original sound – cayleyxo


What do you think? Does your child have homework and what grade are they in? Let us know in the comments below. 

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  • They should not be given so much homework when they are only in kindergarten. That should be the time for learning to mix with others, sharing and making friends. They get plenty of homework when they start grade school

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  • You need all the education you can get start now and as they get older they will handle it better. You can’t climb a mountain if there is no hill

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  • Kindergarten is a time of fun and socialisation not for homework. I think it’s silly the Kindergarten give out homework.

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  • It’s interesting that the homework policies are different between the different states. And there’s also a vast difference between countries.

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  • I agree it’s too much in Kindy, Maybe one page a week if any.

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  • There should be no need for homework at all until well into high school. They’re children!!!!

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  • Homework sounds way too stressful for kindy


    • Homework shouldn’t cause stress, most certainly not in primary school

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  • I think it can be an optional thing for kinder. I don’t see any harm in it in fact probably more beneficial so long as its not strictly forced.

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  • Who has homework in Kindergarten? All three of my kids never did homework in kindergarten. In primary school in the younger years they had the occasional project to do at home other than that it was and is home readers and words for homework.


    • My kids had to recite their sight words and prepare speeches / show and tell

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  • My children didn’t have homework until the year before going to high school so they were able to accept the new learning that would be expected of them. They all did well.

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  • No homework for kindy kids. Read with the family and play games that are fun. Learning comes in many forms. There is plenty of time for that so called homework from grade 3 onwards. I always questioned Homework and made sure it was relevant to the days learning program. I had a Head Mistress who told us Mums at a Parent Group meeting “Homework is expected as Parents want it.” People nearly fell off their chairs as the debate got going on that subject.

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  • Homework for kindy kids, WHAT ???? No way! I’d opt out too. Way to young for such a workload

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  • My daughter is in grade 6 and my son grade 3. Neither child has ever been given homework aside from reading exercises. I think this is wrong as I used to get homework from grade 3 growing up and my daughter’s grammar and spelling is atrocious for her age, and I’m genuinely concerned for her going into high school next year.

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  • None if my kids get homework apart from their readers. Even my high school student…

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  • My kids have seen quite some different primary schools and there is a lot of difference in regards to homework between schools.
    I’ve only one more child in school and she is in year 4 mainstream school. She has a severe cognitive and verbal delay and severe ADHD. After 6 hours of school and therapies I think the afternoon is for relaxing. We do however every night after dinner some sounds/sight-words or a book and writing a couple of words. After which she gets an ice-cream as reward.

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  • Mental health should be priority. And all this at the age of 5!!?!
    I’m with the mum! And I’m glad she’s stood up and said something.

    The amount of homework we would get at my primary school was absurd sometimes even looking back now. So I feel for the kod and the mum. It’s too much

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  • An age appropriate pack for the month to go over activities from school sounds fine. Homework reinforces what is being taught at school. It is important to choose the right time to look at activities and homework; getting ready for school and breakfast time is not optimal when there is so much already going on. A quiet time with a snack and sitting together and being available to support activities/homework is a relaxed way to go.

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  • I find the idea of giving a 5 year old homework utterly ridiculous. I’m in the UK and attended school from 1963 to 1976. When I was at primary school (ages 5-10), we only had homework in the final year of primary school, there wasn’t a great deal of it, also it was only issued on the day, not a pack of homework for the month, and often took the form of preparation for a future lesson . The school day at that age was 9.00 to 15.45 (with an hour for lunch and 15 minutes playtime in the morning and the afternoon). If at the age of 5 the teachers can’t get all the learning a 5 year old needs, done in the school day, then there is something seriously wrong, either with the curriculum or the teacher.

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  • Mental health and the well being if young ones is a priority. So only the parent is able to make judgement and decide what is best.

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  • At 5, that is asking a lot of a child! Let them do it at school

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