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To ALL the dads – you are amazing.

Earlier this week we shared a touching post for mums, now we are proud to share a beautiful post from Part-time Working Mummy that addresses all the dad’s and how amazing they are.

“To the Dad who’s just watched his wife give birth to their perfect baby girl, who was stillborn, it’s ok. It’s ok to feel as crushed as she does right now, it’s ok to feel your heart has been ripped out your chest and stamped on…yes you have to be strong for her but it’s also ok for you not to be ok.

To the new Dad of the precious baby boy, it’s ok to worry about your wife who’s changed so much since he arrived. Having a baby is so hard for her, it’s normal for her to cry on the kitchen floor when she burns the pan of baked beans or threatens to leave you because you left your wet towel on the bathroom floor…her whole life is now ruled by this tiny human you’ve produced and for a while yet he comes before anything and everything, just give her some time & support.

To the Dad of the partner who’s just been diagnosed with severe PND, this illness is a fucker, it turns our worlds into hell when we were expecting heaven. It’s rears its ugly head to rip couples apart with the strain and turmoil it brings along, please don’t let it. Give her love, in whatever way she needs it right now & it will see you through.

To the Single Dad,
You’re nailing this shit, see that self-doubt and parental guilt that hits you most days, that shows you’re doing just fine.
These little lunatics you’re raising will make you cry, they’ll make you rage but they’ll also make you laugh. They’ll make you feel love like you’ve never known and each night when you lay your head down you know you’re doing it by yourself – and one day they’ll come of age and will see that too…and there’s no better feeling in life than being single parent who raises their babies alone or being a child who was raised and loved unconditionally by one amazing parent who never gave up.

To the Dad who’s just been caught cheating, take her shit – take it all. Don’t switch off, be truthful – answer her questions even though they will hurt her. She’s a woman, we need to know the ins and outs of everything & we know when you’re lying, we want to know your thoughts & feelings and why it happened, yes it destroys us but it also helps us process things. More untruths will worsen everything and if there’s any chance of making this shit situation any better she needs to know it all, every last detail.

To the Dad fighting to see his babies,
Don’t give up, ever. Look into your rights, court costs, self-representation. Don’t be put off by Horror stories about dads having no rights in Family Courts.
Remember, one day your child will become a teenager and no matter how much their mind has been poisoned against you or if they’ve been told you rejected them teenagers are inquisitive – they will more than likely want to meet the poison for themselves or be rejected face to face…and if that doesn’t happen that teenager will grow into an adult, and adults see the world for what it is. They see their childhood and what they were told and they know whether it was wrong or right no matter how convincing the lies were when they were little.
So don’t give up, because if you’re a real father one day you will have your baby back.

To the Dad who’s just left his family for another woman, be kind.
Don’t rub her nose in it, be there.
Be flexible to have the kids at a moments notice when she’s at breaking point because you’ve snapped her heart in two and be a decent enough father & husband to not bite back at the voicemails she leaves you at midnight where she’s losing her mind & wishing you dead. She will heal in time, but she needs time.
Don’t ever put your babies in second place to your new partner, if this is meant to be she will wait for you & understand, for she is a woman too & will know that both your actions have caused devastation to your wife & babies. Your children will most probably have their heart broken in later life they don’t need it doing in their childhood by their own daddy.

To the adoptive Dad,
You’re one of the dads I admire the most, you’ve chosen to take on a child out of pure love. You’ve promised to care for him for his whole live and give him the unconditional love he desperately needs. You will provide him with a stable life he deserves without being given any promises or guarantees of a happy ever after. You have one of the luckiest babies on the planet.

To the Dad working away from home,
She appreciates what you do, she doesn’t say it often, she moans and cries and shouts when you are around but that’s because she’s holding this family together alone a lot of the time. She loves you for working so hard to provide for them but these tiny turds test her daily whilst you’re not there, the house needs cleaning, the washing is constant and trying to think of what to cook for tea is mundane and never ending. She loves you, for all that you do, but she’s like she is when you’re home because she just wishes you were there more.

To the dad of the wife who just passed away, you will do this.
You have no option, as much as right now you are praying it was the other way around and you weren’t here anymore time will help to heal your heart. You need to show your babies how you’re going to rock the shit out of bringing them up now their momma isn’t here. You will go to his school plays, you will let her put lipstick on you and you will learn to cook pasta bolognaise for them just how she did. Engage in support groups, be around friends & family and remember it’s ok to cry yourself to sleep into your pillow, yes you’re a big burly man but you’ve just lost half of what you are.

To the Foster Dad,
Remain patient, you’ve picked one of the hardest jobs in the world right now, I know this because I myself was a foster child. No amount of money any council pays you will cover the hard work it requires to help fix a broken baby…and you’re doing just fine, even if they’re screaming in your face that you’re not. One day that child will grow up and look back and be so thankful that there are men like you in this world to help save theirs.

To the lovely step-dad,
You may not have produced these mini terrorists that you’ve taken on but that almost makes you more special.
You love them like they’re your own, you go to work to give them nice things. You take them and collect them from their clubs and you pay an interest into them as the tiny humans they are.
You love their momma unconditionally and ultimately by doing what you are you’re making this world and their future a much better place.
Thank you”

Her post is going viral with over 3000 shares in less than 12 hours.

Share your comments below.

Related story – To the mum hiding in her bathroom, needing peace for just one minute..

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  • My son became a first time father last year. He absolutely loves his son and partner to bits. But freely admits it’s been so hard. But he’s just brilliant! Dads aren’t recognised as much as parents as they should be

    Reply

  • It’s good to have an eye and respect for dads, just as it is for mums !

    Reply

  • It’s so important for fathers to be good role models for both their sons and daughters.

    Reply

  • Yes, men need to be able to cry too. So many suffer from depression, a high possibility is the fact that they are considered to act like kids and cowards if they release their emotional upsets and stress etc in that way. I know of one Dad who lost his wife to teminal illness who has 2 children. He managed not to cry in front of them why he coped with their heartbreak and associated issues.
    One night in particular he put the children to bed,. made sure they were sound asleep, had a shower and while the water was running, had a good long cry. He relieved himself of a little of his heartbreak in the comfort of knowing his little ones were not witnessing his outpouring of grief and getting more distressed and him having to cope with the extra they would suffer as a result.

    Reply

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