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A woman who is sick of financing her younger sister’s children says she secretly thinks her sibling would be ‘better off’ miscarrying her fifth baby.

The 26-year-old says she’s unhappy that her 24-year-old sister is pregnant again, because she can’t afford any more children.

“My sister got knocked up by her boyfriend right out of high school, got married the next year, then proceeded to pop out another baby every year or two, so she has four now at 24,” the woman explained on reddit.

“She’s a stay at home mum, even though she was brilliant and could have gotten a free ride to a great university. Since hers are the only grandkids, our parents fawn over her like she’s the next coming of Christ. They gush over over every new tooth or haircut like it’s some huge achievement.

“Problem is, her husband’s business wasn’t great even even before Covid, and is barely limping along now. Sister doesn’t work, and my parents have limited income. So guess who’s constantly being told to ‘lend’ them money for s**t like school fees, car seat, car payment, new stroller, etc. They don’t even ask!

“My mum just texts me, “Your sister needs $X.XX for the kids” and I’m supposed to cough up. If I complain, they accuse me of being jealous because I don’t have a husband and family even though I’m older (I’m only 26!)”

‘I’m not giving them any more handouts’

The woman says that the situation escalated over Easter.

“Over Easter I notice my sister isn’t drinking and I think oh god, here we go again. Sure enough, she stands up and announces that she’s been inseminated with yet another precious miracle. Everyone’s gushing and I just try to stay quiet and out of the way.

“Later she asks me if everything’s alright and I try to play it off but she pushes so I asked her if she and her husband could really afford another baby. She very snippily replies, “God will provide like he has so far,” which really pissed me off. I yelled that no, actually God didn’t provide for her babies, I did, and I wasn’t going to giving them any more handouts. It devolved into a big argument with everyone shouting at me, and basically I’ve been banned from my family unless I apologise. I haven’t apologised.”

The furious woman says she’s now been left on the outer of the family.

“It’s been radio silence except for one text from my mum saying that if my sister miscarries it’s my fault for stressing her out. I asked if my sister was showing any symptoms but no one will answer or tell me. I don’t think I’m the a**hole but I don’t want to be the reason she miscarries. Also, I think I might be the a**hole because secretly I think it would be better if she did even though I wouldn’t say that to her.”

What do you think of this situation? Let us know in the comments below. 

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  • Considering that the family are not communicating with you, then it is the ideal time to stop shelling out for your sister’s children. My personal opinion is that if you cannot afford to provide fully for your children, you shouldn’t have them, so I am with you 100% in this context. Stand your ground and stop paying.

    Reply

  • Don’t give her anymore money. Your parents are being really rude and disrespectful in texting you how much your sister needs. I think you need to put up some boundaries and tell them you aren’t their cash cow. It seems like neither your parents or sister have any respect for you and if they are likely to say you’re just being jealous etc maybe you don’t need that kind of thing/those people in your life. Don’t let your sister and parents manipulate you.

    Reply

  • Time to set some boundaries so that no one gets taken advantage of.

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  • Awww you poor thing. The expectation on you from your family is just terrible. You are not responsible for your sister. Your parents are not responsible for your sister. She and her husband are responsible for their family. This is a horrible situation and you are being treated so unfairly.

    Reply

  • I understand where she’s coming from. I was unable to have children for a long time and my half sister would fall pregnant at the drop of a hat. She didn’t work and her and her husband didn’t get much money. I’d be the one asked to “lend her money” even though everyone knew it would never be paid back. I finally said no and would only spend money on her children for Christmas or Birthdays. She would tell me what she wanted me to get them and I’d buy what I knew they wanted. She finally realised she couldn’t manipulate me. I now have 2 wonderful and caring boys and I’ve never borrowed from anyone.

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  • If the aunt wants to spoil her nieces/nephews that is her choice but if her sister can’t afford to raise the children she already has, she needs to really think about it before having anymore children.

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  • I wouldn’t wish a miscarriage on anyone, but I do understand the sentiment. I would not be giving over the money. They should be paying their own way. If the grandparents want to help them with money, that is for them, but the sister should not be the one supporting them.

    Reply

  • Wow it’s pretty disappointing that people expect others to help them out all the time. If you can’t afford to have kids then you shouldn’t be having them.
    While I think hoping she loses the baby might be going a bit far, I understand your frustration and I wouldn’t be opening up my purse to her anymore.

    Reply

  • Wanting her to miscarry is absolutely horrible. But I can also completely understand that she does not want to be the one paying for them to be brought into the world. I think she needs contraception for christmas

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  • Wanting her to miscarry is going a little too far but I can understand your frustration

    My sister is having her 4th child but isn’t mentally well enough to look after it
    Her other children live with there fathers
    Its hard to watch but it’s her decision and all you can do is have hope things will work out

    Reply

  • It’s entirely reasonable to refuse to pay for someone else’s kids.

    Reply

  • 24 and 5 kids ! This is all rather sad for those children.

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  • My sister has a three children and she has lived below the poverty line for almost a year once. She managed to pay her mortgage, pay the bills and provide what the children needed.I am blessed with a brilliant hardworking husband and we are very comfortable. She never once asked me for anything. I made sure to cook for them once a week and gave her food we would have wasted and anything else I could without offending her. This persons family is awful for putting so much pressure on her.

    Reply

  • I think you should stop stealing posts from reddit.com and trying to pass it off as an article!

    Do you actually get paid for this? For someone else\\\’s words? And scant editing?

    Reply

  • You should not HAVE to pay for your sisters kids… As their aunt you can spoil ( or not) them as you see fit but it needs to be on your own terms. I can totally understand the resentment, especially as the parents are expecting this to happen. Stand your ground. You work for your money and its up to you how it’s spent. Maybe start putting it in a term deposit so you can’t access it if they ask. They need to learn to stand on their own two feet and provide for their children.

    Reply

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