I see you, new mama. I know what you’re going through is tough right now. I know you’re feeling alone, you’re tired. Some days you are struggling.
I know there’s a part of you that misses when you were just pregnant, when there were no wondering about cries at 3am, and you could sleep… well as good as you could with a watermelon attached to you.
When no one was judging you for the way you parented, when there was no pressure about how to do it – just pressure from the babies kicks to your bladder, but that was easier than what you’re feeling now.
I know you wait desperately for their little eyes to close, those little beady eyes that are so large staring at you that you fear will never close.
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I know you feel so distant from your partner, you both used to be so cool, now you argue over who’s more tired, or your both panicking about why the baby’s crying. You watch him leave the house so easily and that hurts. It’s taken a little toll on you guys even though you made something together and in a weird way your love is stronger.
I know you struggle to leave the house. Who wants to go anywhere when you have to pack a 10 man tent, a whole wardrobe and a baby store and bring a little time bomb that could explode at any moment… I’m talking poo explode here too.
I know you are wondering if you’re doing it right, If you’re screwing them up because you didn’t hear them cry when you tried to shower for 5 seconds.
But you are.
And… I promise you it’ll get easier.
There will be a day those eyes will close and they won’t open until the next morning, you’ll be shocked but it WILL happen.
There will be a day where they’ll look at you and smile, even when you think you’ve messed it all up, they’ll smile and your heart will feel whole again.
There will come a day when they can tell you what’s wrong! All those tears will make sense, and they’ll just need a cuddle from you 99% of the time, and the cookie you were hiding from them to eat later.
There will be days you and your man will go on dates, you’ll have nights out with the girls or you’ll even blissfully shop for groceries alone, and your mind will just be on your babies… they’ll never not be, but you’ll have that time to yourself again.
I’m not gonna tell you to be grateful, to spend every moment appreciating it because it goes so fast, you know that. You don’t need the added guilt. You don’t need to be made to feel worse when you’re exhausted, burned out, alone.
But I promise you the days will, they WILL get easier.
They’ll get brighter.
There will be sunshine again. There will be sleep, there will be wonderful firsts, first words, teaching them to ride a bike, first day at school, their wedding day… there’s so much amazing you’re yet to go through. There will be days you might even want another. Even three!
Don’t give up. This baby. This soul, it chose you. It chose you because out of all the mothers it needed you, just as much as you needed it.. even on the days it’s tough, it’s relentless, it’s blissful it’s wonderful, it’s you and your babies. You’re both on this crazy journey together because there’s no other two souls who are meant to be on it. It’s love, and mama you got it.
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