Hello!

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Proving yourself as the worst mother ever means competing with other mums (online of course) to see who is the most incapable of caring for their children’s basic needs.

They pretend (we hope!) to be revolted by the reality of changing nappies or simply bored to tears by the monotonous routine of bringing up their own child.

Brighton mother Katie Kirby’s bestselling book for imperfect parents — called, Hurrah For Gin — which is filled with gems such as: ‘I love my kids always, I like them sometimes, and I want to spend time with them when I am hungover — never.’

Sarah Turner, author of The Unmumsy Mum and mother to two young boys, describes two of the fundamental adjustments required for motherhood as ‘less Jagerbomb drinking’ and ‘inevitable contact with another human’s snot/sick/s**t’.

One blogger even happily confessed to being so lazy, she gave her toddler a fish finger straight from the freezer to eat.

Ellie Gibson and Helen Thorn told the world about opening the door to a delivery man while ‘still attached to the electric breast pump, boobs out and dripping’ in their book, the horribly titled Scummy Mummy.

Anna May Mangan shared on The Daily Mail,  “there are legions of bloggers, all in a battle to prove why they are the most slapdash mother — backed up by ‘hilarious’ pictures of their half-dressed children on the school run, clutching sandwich bags of dry cereal to eat because Mummy was too busy looking at Facebook to feed them a proper breakfast.”

Once they are tucked away at school, the mothers eagerly log on to parenting forums where, under the cloak of anonymity, they compete to be the most outrageous and foul-mouthed in the pack, wrote Anna.

A recent Mumsnet discussion prompted by the question ‘What do your children do that annoys you most?’ drew some horrible responses.

‘I hate the way he prefixes every f*****g thing he says with the word “Mum”,’ whines one. ‘Jumping on the sofa and being so bloody loud,’ moans another. ‘Not sleeping in their own f*****g bed,’ adds another.

Today, it seems, you must be the slummiest mummy of them all, and pretend to absolutely hate it, to have any sort of social currency.

Anna says, “I can understand this movement. It is a reaction against the dishonesty of celebrity mums who pretend to have achieved family perfection in their artfully cultivated press and social media images.

True, the reality of motherhood is not what Hello! magazine would suggest; pregnancy is rather harder than showing off your perfect bump through green net curtains a la Beyonce, or wafting around in designerwear like Amal Clooney and Rosie Huntington-Whiteley.

And I appreciate how this ‘honesty’ could make new mums feel less isolated and more reassured, and old-hand mums feel entertained.

But in a way, these books are just as deceitful as the celebrity mothering myth they aim to puncture.”

Anna explains, “It is sending a dishonest message that bringing up a baby is nothing more than a pooey, pukey, wine or gin-drinking wheeze. In this dumbed-down world you need no brainpower or compassion to be a mother, just a clock ticking down to your nightly wine o’clock.”

Read Anna’s full article on The Daily Mail here.

Has Motherhood taken a turn for the worst? Do we maybe try to dumb it down too much to compensate for the perfect world of social media?

Share your comments below.

Image via Getty

  • wow this seems so childish! so why complain about the situation that you chose to put yourself in when you decided to have a child? immature

    Reply

  • I do not think for one minute that the world of social media is perfect and it is of course seen through a veil of being edited and preened. I have not heard of this competition and do not see the point. Being the best you can be for yourself and your family is the way to go.

    Reply

  • Constance Hall has a lot to answer for. I for one make sure my boy gets some veggies fairly regularly and I avoid taking pics of myself on the toilet to save him some embarrassment later in life.

    Reply

  • If any of these are genuine there is a lot of neglected children.
    It’s a wonder there isn’t any talking about smoking while feeding their babies – yes I have witnessed it happening. They can’t even wait 1/2 hour or so to have another cigarette. most of us at some point aren’t that excited about changing “soiled” nappies in too close at time together, especially if it has spread further than just in the nappy – especially with small babies. It’s part of being a Mum so we have to get on with it.

    Reply

  • Yes, this is a bit too much trying to dumb it down to compensate for the perfect world of social media, if that is the motive ?

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  • Never heard of this sort of competition. If I understand correctly I think it is awful and encourages people to invent extravagant ways of showing how hard children are. It’s humiliating for them and I recon a form of child abuse, even if you’re just showing the photo of the pooey nappy to clean up that you left or something.

    Reply

  • Yeah, I don’t like this. It’s one thing to admit your kds can make you nuts sometimes, and that it’s hard to be perfect. This is going too far.

    Reply

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