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Em Rusciano has today returned to radio on 2DayFM after having time off following her recent miscarriage.

*Trigger warning – this post discusses miscarriage and infant loss*

Em and her co-host Harley Breen took some time in the show to talk about Em’s heartbreak, holding back the tears, the comedian shared her journey with her listeners.

She shared, “I’m finding it very painful to talk about now and I’m reliving it now and I think that you guys writing it on my Facebook page… and I got thousands of emails and letters…  I know that would’ve caused you to relive it, also.

“I think it’s something that has rewired my cells and my DNA and you know, you I found myself Googling ‘where do I bury my foetus?’ Which is something that is so dark and bizarre and if you don’t laugh you cry.

“These are the things you don’t get told about pregnancy and we just assume it’s going to be easy cause my last two pregnancies were so easy… and I just want to address it once today and I was worried every time I laugh and have fun I was betraying his memory… but what I found out in the last 2 weeks is you can be happy and sad at the same time, which is what I have been.

“I had someone come up to me at a dinner on Saturday night and say I was milking my miscarriage and that I need to get over it… and sometime people have been saying to me, ‘you just need to get over it.’

“I only buried my son six days ago and I don’t know that I’ll ever get over that…and  I don’t think you get to tell someone there is time limit on their grief…

“I just want to let all the women know that I feel you and I see you and I know that the fact got you through it and you were able to tell me that there is a light under the door has really helped me.”

Read more: Support for Em Rusciano as she shares heartbreaking news

In February a grieving mum shared her own miscarriage experience to encourage others to break the stigma and talk about it more. Read her story here.

What would you like to say to Em or anyone else dealing with the loss of an infant? We need to help break the stigma and stick it to these people saying mums shouldn’t grieve over a fetus!

If you’ve experienced a miscarriage and need some support, SANDS helpline is available 24 hours a day, 365 days a year – 1300 072 637.

Share your comments below.

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  • everybody deals with this in their own way and it is not anyone’s place to tell someone else to just simply get over it like as if it were an insignificant event

    Reply

  • Would you say that to somebody who has lost a relative, especially immediate family? Not if you have any compassion at all.

    Reply

  • I think for many (most?) people, it takes a while to work out hw you want to talk about your dead child. When you do, ignore other people’s discomfort and do what feels right for you.

    Reply

  • Its not something you ever ‘get over’. You can move past it and be happy again of course. But you still feel it. You feel it every time you hear about someone losing a baby. You feel it every anniversary. You feel it every time the due date rolls around and you aren’t celebrating a birthday. You feel it at random moments when you see a child around the same age and think about what could have been. You feel it for the rest of your life. It does change how your brain is wired and you shouldn’t ever have to get over it.

    Reply

  • Thank you for providing the name and number of a helpline – it is important to know you are not alone and you are supported. Big hearts are needed at this time.

    Reply

  • My own mum wasn’t much understanding and caused me back then quite some hurt. We should be careful with our words and choose them wisely. When we can’t be understanding or kind, it’s better not to say a thing.

    Reply

  • Thoughtless to say this to anyone that has endured a miscarriage – it is heartbreaking. There there is no timeframe for grief.

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  • I felt like I had to get over my miscarriage quickly, it nearly killed me and made my next pregnancy so bloody scary

    Reply

  • It must be such a heartbreaking thing to go through. How can anyone else tell her to just get over it?

    Reply

  • I would tell her to take all the time she needs Everybody grieves in a different way. Nobody can decide that for her. Very insensitive. I would tell her that I am really very sorry for what happened to her. :-(

    Reply

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