It’s supposed to be a day of relaxing and pampering, but this mum has opted to take a shift at work, rather than spending Mother’s Day with her stepchildren.

She says she’s not sure if she’s being an a**hole by wanting her stepchildren to spend Mother’s Day with their mother, rather than her.

“It’s not that I dislike my stepkids or anything like that I just think they should be with their mum and I thought she would want the time so I planned the day with just my kids,” she explained.

“My husband told me on Saturday night they would be with us and he must not have sensed my feeling because he goes, ‘Now you’ll have all the kiddos for your day’.”

The couple has eight children between them, so the mum says she knows her day will no longer be relaxing or peaceful.

“All I could think of was I’m not going to get to relax that day and my budget just tripled. We each have four kids but only three – my biological children, live with us full time. Three out of four of his kids come EVERY weekend.

“So I decided to cover another mother’s shift for Mother’s Day. My husband’s now mad at me and I tried to explain to him if I’m not going to get to spend the day how I want, I’m just going to go to work. He’s taking it super personal and I have no idea how to convey my feelings without sounding like I don’t love my stepkids, I would just like a break and I thought Mother’s Day was about mothers.”

What do you think of this situation? Let us know in the comments below.


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  • Mothers day is for you, so fair to do whatever you want on that day. And also fair for his kids to spend the day with their mother.


  • Should you marry someone with kids if this is you attitude?


  • Hope it all worked out for you – it would have been a rather awkward situation. Hope you had a happy Mothers Day in the end.


  • Mothers Day is now way too commercialised which is quite Sad its like buy this for mum give mum this and what makes it harder is if you have lost your Mum it just gets too much and over whelming


  • I think it’s very personal and complicated. Each one has a different opinion and one should respect the views. Only because it suits one person doesn’t mean it is ok for another.


  • I think that you are right – they should spend the day with their mother as that is what it is about. Why does the mother not want them on that special day? It sounds as though she is giving them to you every weekend so that she can do her own selfish thing with no impediments.

    I would do the same thing that you are!!! Your husband needs to see it from your point of view!!


  • Get a divorce and all your problems are fixed nothing more to complain about could not be more simple


  • Good on her for taking a shift. At the end of the day if that’s what makes her happy then they should be happy about it.


  • communication required on many levels for this, honestly if working is what you need to do for your sanity, do it, just have a good chat with your hubby, kids and step kids the night before to explain that you are working this year and maybe you can plan something fun for the whole family the follwoing weekend.


  • Do what you have to do for your mental health. Its hard work having to look after so many children, cause I’m sure he won’t be doing much to help from his attitude.
    I’m so over Mother’s day, father’s day etc., its just a way for companies to get you to spend more money. I loved getting hand made cards from my kids when they were little. I know my kids love me I don’t need a card or some flowers to celebrate their love.

    • Yes I agree that days like Mother’s Day, father’s Day, valentines Day and even Easter & Christmas are so over commercialised


  • Personally I never have my expectations up high that Mother’s Day is going to be ‘my’ day and for me that’s not really needed either. I’m happy with the expression of love on mothers day and am grateful for them who made me mum


  • Hey it’s Mother’s Day …do what you want and feel comfortable doing.


  • Tough situation. If it is going to cost a lot stay home and do something fun and creative and make home made pizzas or something and get the kids involved. Lots of fun things to do that are cheap.


  • I understand they should be with their mum, but they might not have a great relationship… I dont see why is so bad. Have a busy day and you can relax another day.


  • Just stay at home but let your husband know you won’t be looking after the kids, that will be his job. I understand you think they should spend the day with their Mother and I applaud you for thinking of your step-children’s Mother on Mother’s Day. I hope your husband realises that this is meant to be your day. If not then on Father’s Day you go out and leave him with all of the children. He might think twice next time.


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