I think you should speak to the other girl’s Mother first and see what she thinks. You could put both girls in the loungeroom (or any other room) and give them a sleeping bag each. At least they will be in your home and not going elsewhere and she did at least ask permission. Hope you come to some compromise so your daughter doesn’t think you’re against her if later on she comes to you saying she’s gay.

The most essential point is for this family to stay connected and to communicate with respect. Sitting down with children and having age appropriate conversations is always so important. Parents and children need to do active listening and hear each other and then manage the outcomes with respect at all times.

Its a tough one.
I do know of a Mum that had a struggle similar as her son was not allowed to have his girlfriend stay over but his Lesbian sister was allowed to have her grilfriend stay over. He protested and said it wasnt fair. I agreed with him. His Mum didnt.

I agree that it is important that both parents need to be on board with sleepovers and both parents need to be comfortable with the type of friendship their child is having at this age. Personally I think when the child grows older towards their teenage age the opinion of the child (or in this case both children and friends) is becoming more important and counts heavier. More then anything it is important to keep the conversations open and show respect and empathy for their views

It is always so very important to follow a gut instinct and intuition and to be comfortable with sleepovers. Both parents and children need to be ready for children going to sleepovers. It is always key to know the parents and the other child and to know the rules of the other household.

Ooooh this is tricky. Because if her daughter was suggesting anything sexual, then it would be a hard no from me, but it sounds like her daughter wants something far more innocent. I guess part of the conversation should be why do they want to identify as girlfriends rather than just friends?

It is perfectly normal for kids this age to want to explore and understand themselves and friendships they want and have. I am not sure about a sleep over but I guess it could come with some conditions or perhaps just an extra long catch up one evening instead? Kids are curious and will want to explain so do remember they want to do this is a safe place and that is a plus.

They are way too young to be ‘going out’. Maybe if they had play dates and things with a parent keeping an eye on them. I personally think it’s a bit young for them to know their sexuality too. They’re probably just mimicking. Especially with an older brother being bisexual. But no, not unreasonable.

I think it is perfectly normal for kids to have at that age crushes and experiment with relationships. I think at that age they may only start to understand relationships in general and their own part in this, by some this may develop far later. I would emphasize the friendship between her and this girl towards your daughter. I would also keep in contact with the parents of this girl. Rather have her sleeping over under your roof then her doing things behind your back somewhere else. You could set boundaries; for example allow a limited time and certain activities.

Ola kids can be sexual at 11 or 12 or sometimes even younger so no it’s not a case of kids just being kids. No wonder we have kid/teen issues if parents aren’t being parents

The mom is saying there is more to the relationship then just being friends. You wouldn’t let a boy stay over so why would you let a girl if it is more than just friends? This mom is doing the right thing

Yes, you’re being unreasonable! Let them be kids for goodness sakes!

I think the rules should be implemented equally for all of your children and shouldn’t matter whether they’re wanting boys or girls over. You’re the parent and while they’re living under your roof your rules apply. Be strong and stand your ground. They might not agree or be happy about it but you love them and are doing the best you know how.

Wow 11 year olds are not 11 year olds anymore.. sad times. Tough question. I have no answer for..

No not at all. Go by your gut. I have a child who is 24 now I was very stricted and over protective and a single mum. If there is a man in the household to no way, a man is a man, follow what your head says. especially these days so much is happening, and this generation they think older than they are. Once they get older they understand and especially when they have there own child. Mine would ask if he could stay over friends I said no, I didn’t even let my child go overnight excursions. My child hated me because of that but they get over it. Our children go through a stage when they hate us, I always said you will get over it. Sex starts at a very young age like 9. I was aloud to stay overnight or go on overnight excursions, I hated my mum but I got over it and I did the same to my child. Never feel guilty it shows you love her.

I don’t think this mum is out of line. The daughter is unhappy because it’s something she wants to do, we all felt that way when we were teens. I think it’s okay to treat it like you would of it were a boyfriend. In a few years time she’ll be old enough

I think they are just kids. And even if she says she feels something different, what would they do at age of 11. They don’t know what and how. If you don’t allow, she will start lying, which is even worse. She will be lying about everything: small and big. You should think it again.

Not unreasonable I’d be explaining to her that sexual activity does happen with 11 and 12 year olds it’s a fact and that you are not disgusting to think like that considering she has different feelings with this girl who you’ve said is not just a friend