Let’s talk about the BIG M! Yep, menopause.

Firstly, why the hell is it called MENopause? Is it because we press the pause button on the men in our life when it happens? And secondly, why is it not talked about more? I mean we all go through it, but it’s up there with periods, incontinence and episiotomies when it comes to awkward conversations.

So so so so many symptoms

Let’s be real ladies, the symptoms are many and varied ranging from and including in no particular order…sweating, bloating, hotflashes, weight gain, insomnia, forgetfulness, and mental fog. Are we done yet? No wait there’s more… anxiety, mood swings, body aches, vaginal dryness, loss of libido, thinning hair and dry skin. All this leaves me in no doubt that God is definitely not female.

It’s hard to feel positive, attractive and confident when dealing with all these symptoms and as a woman of a certain age, I reckon we should bring it out in the open and talk about it more. With that in mind, I decided to rewrite the lyrics to the jazz classic ‘Fever’ and sing about it.

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Never know until it hits you

Never thought that you would succumb

Suddenly it creeps up on you

Now you are the chosen one


You get fever

But you’re not sick

Fever and you’re burning up

Fever it’s a hot flash

Fever and it really sucks


Sitting in a business meeting

Acting like a boss lady

Suddenly the sweat comes creeping

You start to act irrationally


You got fever

You need air con

Fever makes you desperate

Fever, grab the remote

Control that bloody thermostat


All the ladies get the fever

Menopause the evil witch

First you sweat and then you bloat

You get cranky and your skin does itch


Poor Karen got it early

She was only 45

No wonder she’s a big complainer

It’s the only way she can survive


She got the fever

Way too early

Fever got her in her prime

Fever made her cranky

If you see Karen please be kind


So fellars if you have a lady

Sleeping in your bed at night

When she kicks off all the blankets

Don’t you dare start up a fight


She got the fever

And she can’t sleep

Fever 3 times a night

Fever makes her cranky

Careful cos she just might bite


So have your fans and tissues ready

Mop your brow and cause the air to flow

And when the weather’s cold and icy

You can laugh because you know


You’ve got fever

To keep you toasty

When everyone is icy cold

Fever, your inbuilt system

The benefits of getting old


This really made us giggle! Tell us how you laugh through menopause? Share in the comments below.

  • Jean hailes foundation have some great resources for women going through menopause.


  • I have been going through Menopause for like over 8 years now is there are end to it all


  • Definitely needs to be talked about more. All stages of womanhood need to be talked about more.


  • I haven’t been having much trouble, actually.

    • Me neither, I suppose we’re lucky !


  • How creative of her, and to spend all that time and effort in making a song that is relatable too! Well done.


  • I love this song! Thank you so much! I went through Menopause relatively early, but also relatively quickly, so I guess, in a way, I was lucky. I have heard terrible tales of how bad it can be and how long it can last, and I feel nothing but sympathy for women suffering like this …. but this song has definitely given me reason to laugh and smile!


  • I can relate to all of this


  • Awesome, thank you.


  • I just love this song, it explains it in a nutshell. I went through menopause at 32 so I totally agree with this song.

    • Oh my goodness, that is so young to go through it. Thanks for sharing. A lot of people think it only happens in your 50s and over.

      • Wow, you were very young indeed Tessie !!


  • Good article to read.


  • I’m still struggling through menopause, I can totally relate to this song


  • Thanks for sharing the song – that’s a good one!


  • I am so happy my post and song has got you ladies all chatting. Menopause is so different for all of us. I work as a simulated patient for medical students and have learned so much about it as well as through personal experience. Some ladies experience it very early due to hysterectomies, some experience flushes for years before their periods cease, some women still have symptoms in their 70s and some lucky ladies breeze through it. Anxiety is a biggie that no one seems to acknowledge. It definitely is an associated symptom of menopause. Please keep talking about it, share this post and keep laughing because that’s the best medicine. :)


  • I’m perimenopausal. And yet I never knew such a thing existed. I thought Menopause was it! We need to talk, to understand, to share our stories. Every woman’s experience is different. I really found it hard to find information, and as someone who at 51, has probably been experiencing symptoms for around 4 years or so. Information is everything. It empowers us, helps us understand, and we can then educate those around us. I love that the conversation has started. Let’s keep it going.


  • I went through menopause at about the age of 53 and four years later I still get the occasional hot flush.


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