The house smells so bad

 the stench of poo lingers.

Oh wait, oh no!

Is that sh%t on my fingers?

It’s under the nail.

Must wash it quick.

I head to the sink

as my baby is sick.

Give me a break kids

Really? Both ends?

I need to get out

to visit my friends.

We discuss the highs

and lows to being “mum”.

Whilst kids play and jump

and fall on their bum.

Compare our birth stories

Share “OHHH, AHHH and WOW.”

To be honest I think

we should all take a bow.

12 hours, 2 days?

No mine was three.

Then an offering from the midwife

of toast and strong tea.

Second time is better.

It’s out with a whoosh.

A few sharp contractions

and one mighty push.

No time for epidural

or even gas and air.

They tell you at the hospital

while you yell in despair.

“Introducing our new baby.”

“Mother is doing well.”

That’s because we get on with it

so no one can tell.

Our stomachs wobble.

Our boobs start to sag.

Then Hitler kicks in

and we instantly nag.

“His bed time is seven.”

“We must go back home.”

“Stop that, don’t do that!”

“No, leave that alone”.

Us women, we’re amazing.

Bloody machines.

Yet we pray every night

we’ll fit back in our jeans.

Welcome to the group.

It’s called motherhood

We’re ready and listening.

You are understood.

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