Do you have any friends or family that are overly affectionate with your kids. I do, and it drives me absolutely crazy!

So when a mum posted on reddit that she can’t stand it when her in-laws never stop kissing her one-year-old baby, I knew exactly how she felt.

“How do I get my husband’s family to stop kissing my 1yr old? I’ve already asked them to stop and they “forget” or ‘don’t see the problem’. I don’t want them to kiss her on the lips because I don’t see the NEED for people to kiss her on the lips,” she shared.

The frustrated mum said that she felt that kissing her child on the lips was unhygienic and she was concerned her child might catch something. It also made her very uncomfortable.

“It makes me uncomfortable. There’s another child in the family and they hardly ever kiss him. I feel my brother-in-law is the weirdest with it to the point that it creeps me out. How do I get them to stop? (I live with them so not letting them around her would be sort of difficult),” she continued.

Stop The Smooching

Many of the commenters were in agreement with the poster, suggesting some tactics to get the kissers to stop their smooching.

“Hey, baby has gotten sick a lot recently, so keep the smooches to the top of the head or tummy please,” suggested one comment.

“Maybe saying something like this: “I have asked you before not to kiss [child] on the lips but you keep doing it. It makes me wonder why you think your desire to be physically intimate with a little girl is more important than respecting the physical boundaries we’ve put in place to protect her.”

“If they can’t follow the rules they don’t get baby snugs. You don’t have to get crazy or yell, it’s simple. Your baby, your rules.”

Others felt that ‘violating your stated physical boundaries’ was definitely not on.

“I’d make a fuss,” said one commenter.

It’s A Generational Issue

One reddit user suggested that this may be a ‘generational issue’.

“This is a really tricky subject that can cause quite a bit of contention between parents and grandparents. It seems to be a generational thing from.my experience. My parents didn’t understand why I wouldn’t let them hold my baby when he clearly disliked bring held by others”.

“For me it’s to do with consent, children are often unable to provide consent to physical affection, but that should not mean they don’t get a choice. As the parent you are the most in tune with your child and will often know what they are most comfortable with.” they advised.

We’ve all read horror stories of young babies catching the deadly cold sore virus from overly affectionate physical attention so we are in absolute agreement with this mum.

What would you do in this situation? Tell us in the comments below.

More On Mouths of Mums

  • The cheeks but not the lips. I know you’re the grandparents but I’m the parent – respect my wishes. You had your turn to raise children…

    Reply

  • Hi I feel they should be respecting the wishes and request of the family

    Reply

  • Another option is to buy a multi pk of face masks and every morning great the in -law family with good morning and then place of mask over their mouth, replace throughout the day. I am sure they soon will get the message.

    Reply

  • People need to respect the wishes of the child’s parents. Simple.

    Reply

  • How are about 99% of babies taught to kiss by their parents……on the mouth??? Some toddlers actually instigate it until you encourage them to kiss on the cheek or elsewhere on your face.

    Reply

  • I don’t agree with anyone kissing a baby or child on the lips. I know that you live with them but it doesn’t give them any rights to ignore your wishes. I’d stand firm in your decision if I was in your situation

    Reply

  • That’s so hard especially as they live with them. I very hard frank conversation is the only way to stop it

    Reply

  • I don’t think the mum’s request is unreasonable.

    Reply

  • I’m not sure how I feel about this – I’ve honestly never really thought about it. I can definitely see where the mum is coming from. Maybe it’s time to try and move out (easier said than done I get that). Good luck in trying to find that mutual understanding.

    Reply

  • I’m with th mum on this one. Respect the boundaries. Thank goodness my in-laws stayed in New Zealand!

    Reply

  • WOW! There’s a lot about this that makes me uncomfortable. It’s about boundaries and respecting the Mum’s wishes. This will spill into other things if boundaries are not created and kept.


    • Yes I agree, when I was her I would do everything to move out !

    Reply

  • Stop visiting them and avoid their visits, you need to keep telling them, do not feel guilty about your instincts, mother knows best and it is your baby not theirs. Just flat out tell them I do not want you to kiss on the lips because I want my baby not to pick up germs. If you see them doing it get a face cloth and wipe them off, they will hopefully get the message.

    Reply

  • You would think that those around you would simply respect your wishes.

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  • Now days we know germs and bacteria and dieseas can be transfered by the lips very easy and babies immune is not as strong as adults just got to keep educating them i guess ?

    Reply

  • From my observation children love to get a hug, not a kiss. I’d keep saying that you don’t like it and hugs are better and if your child also doesn’t like it, then tell her to turn her head.

    Reply

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