Mum shares her shock after being asked to contribute $46 for her 10-year-old daughter to attend a friend’s birthday party.

Posting anonymously to the forum Netmums she explained that she had only been given two days notice ahead of the event and was asked to pay a fee after accepting the invitation.

“My 10 year old daughter has been invited out for a friends birthday, there’s about 10 of them going and we’ve only been given 2 days notice. The mum messaged me and asked if she could go to which I said yes, she then replied with a price it would cost. Altogether I’m going to be expected to pay around £25.” ($46au)

“I wouldn’t have minded so much if the cost was made clear in the beginning but it was only after I accepted the invite. Should I still bring a gift,” she asked.

She continued, “Maybe this is a done thing but I personally wouldn’t dream of inviting my DD’s friends to a party and asking for a contribution! If I couldn’t afford for her to do something with that many friends we wouldn’t do it or we’d cut the guest list down! Opinions? Maybe I’m just being unreasonable!”

Comments include:

“Oh that’s odd? If I was inviting other kids to go out with my son for his birthday, then I would fully expect to foot the bill!”

“I’d be p’d off. The parents throwing the party should pay, and tbh it seems like your dd is only a last minute invite, to make up numbers.”

“I wouldn’t ask others to pay. If you can’t afford your child’s birthday party you shouldn’t be throwing one in my opinion. Also why only two days notice?”

“What a cheek! There is no way I would hold a party and then expect people to pay for it!

“Very odd. Not once have I come across having to pay, and we’ve done our fair share of taking kids out to birthday events and parties at home! But then maybe they are extremely hard up and this is the only possible way they can do it. Very bad organisation though too – two days! Poor kid may not get many yes-s on that basis.”

How would you respond?

Share your comments below

  • Unless stated on the initial invite I’d probably tell my child no you’re not going. Not fair on all kids concerned though. What a cheek!


  • This is the same as expecting people to pay to attend a wedding. No. Not ok. If you can’t afford it then do something cheaper. A park is free.


  • Unless the party is at some kind of play centre and there’s an entry fee for each kid, even then the parents should be made aware before they accept the invite


  • Guests should not have to pay. I would not have a party that you would expect your guests to pay.


  • I meant no gift for the birthday child


  • I’ve always given my boys a birthday party and if it was going to be out of the house I’d work out the costs ahead of time to see if I could afford it. I’d never ask the guests to pay. I’d also only cater for the children and not their parents. I’d be offended if it was asked of me and there’d definitely be no gifts for the birthday guest


  • I’d pay, if I was throwing the party. And if I couldn’t, I’d make it clear on th invite that there was a Cost – INSTEAD of bringing a present.


  • If they were doing something crazy expensive, then maybe but honestly I wouldn’t have done that as a child’s birthday party.


  • Guests shouldn’t have to pay, that is crazy. If you want your guests to pay then maybe you can’t afford to have that party and should re-think it.


  • I think it depends on the situation. If buying a package deal with kids included then no, guests shouldn’t have to pay. But say for instance you were having a party somewhere and as you didn’t buy a package and guests could simply show up on the day and pay an entry fee- that would be okay.


  • I would never ask guests to pay for my parties…that’s ridiculous


  • I wouldn’t ever expect anyone to pay for the cost of a bday activity. But I guess it depends on the circumstances. Maybe if it was an activity and catering / lunch / drinks etc supplied then you maybe able to meet in the middle.


  • Seriously? No way. That is so shifty. The payment should have been advised upfront. It may be why the invite was last minute … noone else was prepared to pay it. That’s just not on.


  • If you can’t afford to have a birthday party for your child, don’t have one. It is not right to ask attendees to pay for the party and also presumably give a present.


  • I have been asked on several birthday invites to foot the bill for entry fee, which I found really odd coming from the uk we always paid for everything. In appears to be quite normal here to request entry fee in western australia. Very odd

    • Wasn’t the story from the UK?
      I have never been asked to contribute to a party in Aus. Sometimes we’ll casually get together and therefore pay entry to a playcentre or something like that, but it’s not an actual party…


Post a comment
Like Facebook page

LIKE MoM on Facebook

Please enter your comment below
Would you like to include a photo?
No picture uploaded yet.
Please wait to see your image preview here before hitting the submit button.
Your MoM account

Lost your password?

Enter your email and a password below to post your comment and join MoM:

You May Like


Looks like this may be blocked by you browser or content filtering.

↥ Back to top

Thanks For Your Star Rating!

Would you like to add a written rating or just a star rating?

Write A Rating Just A Star Rating