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A mum who found out she was having her fourth daughter during a very public gender reveal, says while she couldn’t be happier to be raising four daughters, gender disappointment is real.

And just to prove her point, she shared the emotional video of the moment she found out she was having another baby girl, complete with her tears and her daughter’s heartbreaking reaction.

Kendra Evens organised a Halloween-themed gender reveal, complete with a pumpkin releasing smoke. And as she and her husband and three daughters looked on, the Jack-O-Lantern revealed a trail of pink smoke.

@dailydoseofmygirlgang Gender disappointment is real so dont judge us, little did we know our nellie would complete our family & we couldnt be happier to be raising our 4 daughters! Couldnt imagine life without that sweet girl #girlgang #fourdaughters #girlmom #sahm #pumkinhead #thisishalloween #fall #genderreveal #daughters ♬ Oh Klahoma – Jack Stauber

It prompted Kendra to begin crying, with her head in her hands, and one of her daughters to yell, “We get a girl? What? Why do we have to get a girl?”

Kendra’s husband consoled his wife, with someone in the background shouting, ‘Girl gang all day!’.

“When I got pregnant with my fourth baby, I knew it was my last and after already having three amazing daughters, it was only natural that I, of course, wanted a boy,” Kendra told PEOPLE. “On top of that, all three of my pregnancies with my daughters were all the exact same, but with this last pregnancy everything was so different so in my head I swore it was a boy.

“Going into the gender reveal, I was hesitant on doing anything because I didn’t want to be disappointed in front of people if it wasn’t a boy, but then I was reminded it was my last pregnancy and I didn’t want to have any regrets.”

She admits that she had little control over her reaction, and even wrote in the video’s caption on TikTok: ‘Gender disappointment is real so dont judge us, little did we know our nellie would complete our family & we couldn’t be happier to be raising our 4 daughters! Couldn’t imagine life without that sweet girl.’

“All of my emotions immediately hit me, I couldn’t help but cry. There was no control of my emotions at that point, especially being pregnant. And all of these thoughts came flooding, thoughts that I’ll never have a son, never be able to experience what it’s like to have a mother-son bond, to have a ‘mama’s boy,’ or anything like that.

“Gender disappointment is real, both for mum and/or dad. Our feelings are valid as humans and gender disappointment should be more normalised. You don’t know anyone’s situation or feelings, and just because somebody is initially disappointed doesn’t mean baby is not loved.”

gender disappointment

gender disappointment

She says having four daughters is amazing, and that her girls are lucky to have each other.

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  • There is a difference between how this mum has acted as opposed to what others do when they find they are not getting what they want gender wise. She had an initial disappointment. To be fair, I think I would have been disappointed if my girl ended up being a boy – when we had the ultrasound they were only around 75% sure, so there was always a chance. It would have been very awkward as we had already bought the clothes and done the nursery. We would have made it work though.

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  • Feelings are feelings and there is no right or wrong with feelings. But I don’t understand why people do a public gender reveal. Most people like to throw a gender reveal party to disclose to family and friends what their baby’s sex is. At that moment the parents already know the gender, so I don’t understand the sudden outburst of emotion in public. It all looks a bit dramatised to me.

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  • I remember reading this article last year and her reaction when she found out she was having another girl was interesting. I am sure no matter what that family will love that little girl but that post is out there for the world to see, I hope that little girl doesn’t see it.

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  • I can understand her reaction to finding out she was having another girl but I also know that they will love that little girl as much as they love their other 3 girls. If she was like me, you want to give your husband a son, it’s natural and doesn’t mean you don’t want her. It’s just a momentary thing because you’ve talked yourself into believing you are having a boy, a mini version of your husband, kind of.

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  • I understand them expecting a boy after 3 girls but why making the reveal so public for everyone to see your reaction (including the 4th girl after growing up)
    Imo, when people decide to have a baby their gender shouldn’t matter. If gender is going to be such a dealbreaker for the parent to the point of being disappointed (and even teaching your other girls to be disappointed on having another sister), better don’t get pregnant

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  • I understand the disappointment at not getting the son you dont have but you would have realised the likelihood of you having another girl. In which case, why did you have a very public reveal. It wasn’t a necessity. I have both sexes so can’t comment on how I’d feel if I didn’t. I don’t judge you for gender disappointment but I do for gender reveal disappointment and expect you only went ahead with it so you’d be able to post it on your socials.
    out on

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  • I do not care how tou dress this up or justify yourself. Gender disappointment is selfish and wrong. If this might be your automatic reaction, then do not hold a reveal, and do not show your children and society that “it is okay.”

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  • Oh my god that photo of the little cutie in the orange onesie is adorable!! What a beautiful family. I think it’s okay to feel your feelings. Having an expectation or fantasy and knowing it isn’t going to meet that and being a bit disappointed is fine and normal. This little girl is going to be just as loved as each daughter.

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  • I anyone judges you then they certainly aren’t a friend I’d want to keep. Congratulations on having a beautiful baby girl. My son has one son from a previous relationship and 3 daughters with his wife. They are all loved equally by everyone including me. As long as our babies are healthy and happy, that’s all that matters and I know you’ll love her just the same as your other beautiful girls.

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  • Who cares… as long as she is healthy it is all good. Maybe she is only meant to have girls.

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  • I still don’t get a gender reveal. Just be surprised at the actual birth. It must be hard knowing you’re having all girls though. A boy in the mix would be good.


    • I had all girls and was very happy…..nothing hard about it for me

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  • Fair enough, but perhaps don’t do such a public gender reveal. If you desperately wanted a boy, perahsp something intimate with your partner could have been better.

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  • I absolutely get where she is coming from. I could have swore my second would be aboy and i was a little sad. But i cant imagine life without my two girls now!! Life gave me what was meant to be.

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  • If you’re not going to be happy no matter the gender, don’t have a baby.

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  • I believe that Gender Parties are getting out of hand, this mum obviously was heartbroken, but of course she loves all her Girls as she is a great mum. My Nan had 9 Boys and 3 Girls, and in our entire Family Girls are really rare. She always said be Thankful for what you have. I myself have 2 of the most Gorgeous Boys, I wanted to have a large Family but I almost lost my life both times. So all Mums out there PLEASE be thankful for which ever Gender you have and just Love them cause some people can’t even have them.
    .

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  • i am happy with my girls. there is no regret

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  • Well she could convince one to do a gender change, seems to be the in thing ????

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  • Gender reveal parties? Why risk it? I’d rather save the money I’ve spent on throwing a gender reveal party and spend it on maybe a getaway?

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  • We have 2 girls and my hubby is the only boy in his family so family name dies with us. My man is a fantastic girl dad but would’ve loved to have given him a little boy xx

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  • I honestly believe that gender reveal parties are getting abit over the top and the expectations are sometimes just not warranted. Just having a healthy pregnancy, normal baby and safe delivery is of utmost importance than anything else.

    Reply

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