Before you grace me with your blessings to marry your child, there’s something I need to know- what’s in it for me?
What precisely do your ‘blessings’ entail? And what difference will it make to my marriage if I don’t obtain them?
If you grant them to me, will I gain special privileges? Will you be more accepting of me? Could you then put our differences aside?
What if I don’t pass your test? If you can’t bestow your blessings upon me? If I am simply not worthy in your eyes- what then?
By granting me your blessings, are you honestly going to provide me with protection or favours?
Will you be there through the hard times actively assisting, or will you just be giving unwanted advice from the sidelines?
Can We Count On You For Support?
When we have a baby, can we count on you for support? To help with caring for and spending time with the new addition to the family? To play your role as grandparents with love and understanding?
Are you prepared to change nappies? Feed? Babysit? And actively play a role in their lives? Will you treat all of your grandchildren equally, as long as their parents seek your blessings first?
I want my children to know that they don’t need my “blessings” to marry whoever they want to make that commitment to- after all we aren’t gods, we don’t have any kind of supernatural power over anything or anyone.
They have my approval- not that they need it. And I will be there for them whenever they want me. Providing them with support out of love- not simply because they sought my “blessings” to make their own life choices.
Keep in mind that if you do have firm beliefs in your children seeking approval from you before entering into marriage, then you should be prepared to enrich their lives- or at the very least treat them EQUALLY.
Otherwise what benefit is it to them to ask for your blessings to begin with…
As much as your child is special to you- I am to my parents. More than that though, I know my self-worth, and it is because of this that I seek ‘blessings’ from no mere mortal. The terms and conditions on your contract were always too small to read anyway…