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If you’re thinking about divorce then you need to understand how to talk to your kids about it and you must commit to telling the kids before the situation gets out of hand.

Your children can sense when something is wrong, and your children will figure things out without your help.

The divorce could be even more painful than it already is if you have not properly addressed the situation as soon as possible with your kids.

Here are some tips to help you handle this delicate situation:

1) Tell them early

Make certain that your kids are told about a divorce long before it happens.

Let your children know if there is a planned trial separation, and let your children know if you plan to move to different parts of the city.

Many couples will move far from each other, but your children must be prepared the distance that is now between them and one of their parents. Talking to your kids as soon as possible makes life much easier for everyone.

2) Be honest with them

Helping kids get through a divorce is not easy if you are dishonest.

Your children will see through any excuse you create for them and you must be completely honest about why you are divorcing.

Your children could find out things later about your divorce that will bring the pain back all over again.



3) Make a plan

Your kids must be involved in the plan that will be used once the divorce is final.

Where your children live, when they see your ex and how you will deal with remarriage must be something the kids are involved with. Kids who are not informed well during a divorce proceeding will be questioned by a judge and the judge may have a different opinion from your own.

Do not leave your custody arrangement up to a judge when you can work it out on your own with your kids.

4) Find counselling

Your kids will need some form of grief counselling after a divorce. The breakup of the family can be traumatic for your kids, and you want to avoid the trauma as much as possible.

Counsellors can help kids get through the worst parts of a divorce and you will not be saddled with a job that you are not qualified for. A licensed counsellor knows best how to help you and your kids get through this difficult time.

5) Keep talking

Allow your children to talk about the divorce long after it has happened.

You must tell your kids that things cannot be changed, but you should allow your kids to express their grief.

Kids who can talk to their parents are more likely to come out of a divorce healthy, and you will prevent lasting trauma that comes from bottling up their emotions.

Do you have any useful tips to add to these? Please share in the comments below.

Image courtesy of Shutterstock.com
  • Wise tips. Communication and honesty are very important.

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  • Honesty is very important and I think having a good support network is also useful

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  • I think it would be best to be straight up with the kids, even if they don’t completely understand :)

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  • I think the most important thing is to be up front and honest. Kids pick up more than we realise.

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  • so many divorces

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  • This must be an extremely difficult position to be in, for the parents and the kids, you just need to remember to leave the kids out of it. It’s not their fault so don’t make it

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  • talking divorce

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  • explaining

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  • it s hard but have to let them know they will know when they grow up

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  • talking to kids

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  • talking withh kids and explaiing the divorce

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  • Not an easy subject! A good article!

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  • be the rock for your children, not the other way around. I have heard of many kids trying to step up to fill the role of the absent parent and it forces them to grow up before their time

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  • It must be a sad situation to be in, I’m glad I’ve never had to experience it. Kids are very perceptive and they do need to be included in all major family events.

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  • It is hard but communication is the key.

    Reply

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