July 5, 2019


Mum shares an open letter to all the mums doing it tough while they rush around the grocery store.

To the embarrassed mum in Coles ignoring her screeching toddler:

You are teaching important lessons sweetheart. I do not judge you.

To the exhausted mum in Coles piling her cart with packaged snacks because fed is best:

You are working too hard, you need to cut some corners. I do not judge you.

To the frustrated mum in Coles cursing under her breath at the self-serve checkout as her kids repeatedly set off the “ask for assistance” screen:

You are doing all of the things, all of the time, your patience must be spent. I do not judge you.

To the harried mum in Coles with four loud children, one without shoes:

Your life looks busy and you cannot possibly keep on top of everything. I do not judge you.

To the shameless mum in Coles whose 6 year old told her younger sister to “stop screaming for a toy or mum will take your photo and put it on Facebook”:

Threats work, even 6-year-olds know that! I do not judge you (that much).

Once upon a time I would have looked down on that lady in uggs dragging four children around the supermarket, but I’ve become wiser over the years. These days that lady kinda warms my heart.

Let’s cultivate compassion. For me it’s the key to respecting myself amid horrendously imperfect attempts to be, well, perfect.

I’m quite reasonable at extending compassion to others, I’m slowly learning to grant it to my ugg-boot-wearing-more-crass-than-class-these-days self.

This post originally appeared on The Motherlode Facebook page.

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  • I think this is lovely and so true for so many!


  • I have a friend whose child has sensory issues and can’t cope with some types of lighting or loud noises – including music in shops. One supermarket chain has stores that have quiet times for people with those issues. Unfortunately some people with no issues take advantage of the supermarket being quiet as far as the numbers going there and aren’t quiet so the benefit for genuine cases is lessened.


  • Lord this bring horrifying images back to me. Nothing worse than felling like your child is disturbing others. This brings me hope that there others that understand


  • Amen, it is exhausting being a good parent. Sometimes we do ignore those screaming kids for a reason.


  • There needs to be so much less judging going on! I work in a shop and see poor mums all the time battling with their kids and instead of using my energy to judge, I don what I can to help her, its a small gesture, but so appreciated by the mum


  • This can’t be more true, this happens to me all the time especially in supermarkets with my 3yo drives me crazy.


  • These are wise words! I think some people need to read this and be a little more kind when they see little ones out in public that may be having a little bit of a melt down.


  • We definitely need to encourage less judging and teach this to the little eyes that are watching us.


  • I’m a tired and irritable mum at the moment and snap and burst out in tears here and there, so yeah I don’t judge anyone.


  • I can completely relate and certainly try my best not to judge. I sometimes find it hard to work out if I should try help in any way because It could just ease the parents burden, but on the other hand t might embarrass them. We never really know what is going on in peoples lives,, so should definitely try very hard not to judge them. Funnily though, I often hear the ones judging are in fact parents themselves, so surely they would have gone through a similar situation at some point in their parenting lives.


  • This was comforting to read


  • A few of the comments certainly resinate with me well. Shopping can be full on with children.


  • Ive been helped so many times at the supermarket as miss 3 decides to run away. Im so thankful to everyone who doesn’t judge and gives a helping hand.


  • Most of the parents I see out shopping with children are doing a great job.


  • All it takes is a knowing look, a kind word, or someone else to tell the kids off. Every bit helps. Let’s be everyone’s village


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