The mum says she was furious when she discovered her newborn’s name change… almost two months after the birth!

A new mum has shared her anger in an advice column on Slate after discovering that her mother-in-law changed the spelling of her newborn’s name behind her back. Looking at her son’s birth certificate eight weeks after the birth, the mum says she noticed that his middle name had been recorded with a different spelling, and was horrified when her husband confirmed his mother’s involvement…

Absolutely Furious

The mum says that she had discussed her son’s middle name with her husband prior to the birth and they had agreed on ‘Finley’. Unfortunately, the birth didn’t go as planned and her son was delivered via emergency C-section, which is allegedly when her mother-in-law took the opportunity to put in her two cents’ worth about the newborn’s name. “I, of course, am furious because I told him I was fine with the middle name but it had to be spelt Finley and he agreed before our son was ever born,” she said. “Now here is where it gets tricky. Apparently his mother guilt-tripped him into (changing it to Finlay) while I was asleep after my emergency C-section.” If that’s not total manipulation and taking advantage of a situation, we don’t know what is!

Not The First Time

To add insult to injury, it turns out that her mother-in-law had also tried to change her child’s first name allegedly saying that her daughter-in-law would “get over it”. The mum said she is debating confronting her mother-in-law about the issue as this kind of interference and manipulation is becoming a pattern. “My husband is very much also at fault for doing this in the first place and we are working through that together, but I feel as though something needs to be said to my mother-in-law,” she wrote.

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This story is totally unbelievable – does this mother-in-law sound interfering or what!? Hopefully this new mum is able to change her newborn’s name to the spelling she originally wanted and get her husband to be a little more assertive when it comes to his interfering mother!

Has a family member ever tried to convince you to change your chosen baby name? Let us know in the comments! 

  • I would say this is a way of still trying to control her son. He’s showing that she still means more to him by not upsetting her instead of you. I bet she does other things to annoy you as well in a regular basis.


  • OMG I would be so upset. What an interfering biddy.


  • Oh my lord I’d be ropable! What a horrible mother in law


  • Oh my what a nosey mother in law, she should keep her views out of it as it’s not up to her. Yet I guess she’s been used to always controlling her son. I would be furious, yet who was it that filled in the birth certificate form? I guess it was the husband, something a wife & husband should do together.


  • She has no right and for the husband to go along with it is despicable. Mummies boy
    My ex MIL was a nightmare but she never went this far


  • Wow that is insane! Shame on both of them. I would NOT be able to keep my mouth shut I would have changed the name back immediately and explained to them that the paperwork was forged by my MIL would have no issues in confronting MIL either.


  • Absolutely gobsmacked! I would be out for blood! This is the parent’s right and has nothing to do with the MIL. Maybe that hubby needs to grow some balls!


  • That is so horrible! I can’t believe her husband couldn’t speak up to his mum about it.
    I’m glad I didn’t have to deal with anything like this.


  • This is a problem. My in-laws were very manipulative so unless this behaviour is addressed now, there will continue to be problems moving forward. BOUNDARIES please.


  • Wow! Seriously who would do that? The fact that the husband knew about it too blows my mind. I’m lucky that my MIL would NEVER do anything like that and if she was going to, my husband certainly wouldn’t allow it. Naming your child and choosing the spelling is a moment for parents and only others if asked for input!!!


  • Wow I’m so glad I have a wonderful mother in law that would never do anything like this


  • This breaks my heart for the mother. Choosing your baby’s name is a very personal thing and to have it changed behind her back, it’s just so wrong. I hope she stands up to her MIL and is able to get it changed to the correct way she wanted it spelt.


  • It sounds like she’s a jnmil (just no mother-in-law), which means she will manipulate every situation to try to get her own way, if your husband doesn’t start to grow a spine, she could cause many problems in the marriage. So you have to tell her now, that she has no right to interfere, and get your husband to realise that he is married to you, not his mother, and it’s up to the both of you to make decisions about your family, not her. If he is not going to stand by you over something like this, when you had both agreed, what else is he going to let her get away with, and how is that going to impact on your marriage. Also, tell your husband how hurt you are that he could do something like that to you, that you two are a team that his mother is not a part of, and that if wants the marriage to last, he had better start acting like he is there for you.


  • I wouldnt be happy either and definately would front her. Husband was to blame also


  • MIL is way out of line and husband needs to grow up. If he wanted to change the spelling he should have spoken to his wife. She can change it back, I added a middle name to my son after the initial birth certificate


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